How often do you hear about these essential qualities? Probably a lot. The idea of integrating these three together is very popular right now. But do you understand how much their integration defines who and how you are in the world?
When working with disease, ennui, unhappiness, and dissatisfaction I see how these three are disconnected. Most people go through life living without feeling deeply into one of these three spaces.
People who remain in unhappy relationships or unsatisfying working situations are not listening to their spirit or their mind. They disregard the feeling of ennui and simply press forward, after a while this leads to a deeper crevasse in their spirit, mind, body connection and can lead to a lack of healthy actions on how they care for their body, or to behaviors that are inconsistent with their mind (values) and heart (spirit). People who abuse their bodies with drugs, smoking, bad food, or lack of exercise are not feeling into their bodies or their spirit…they may be disregarding what their mind is saying. When you are spirit, mind, and body integrated you know that smoking is hurting you, you feel it in your spirit, in your body, and you can see and understand it in your mind.
Everything, and I mean EVERYTHING you need to know you have access to through your integrated Spirit, mind, and body connection. Your internal sensory guidance system communicates with you at lightening speed and with perfection about your actions and experiences, your ‘doing and being’, to assist you to remain integrated and to amplify that integration to create success.
The question is will you listen to your inner communications or will you ignore these. The life you want is completely within your grasp. Step into the grace of being and allow the perfection of your life to present itself to you. Reconnect spirit, mind, and body. Take action from that integrated inner connection and knowing. Then everything that matters and has value to you will be yours.in love and light, bg
Negotiating the treacherous waters of parenting can be anxiety provoking and discouraging.
This results from both internal insecurity and external unpredictability.
Three steps will keep you in the flow and having fun as you reclaim the role of mama/papa/leader.
Step 1. Strengthen your connection to your personal sensory guidance system. This is the connection to the information freeway from your five senses and your intuition. This is information about your environment, your child, and others that assists you in making thoughtful decisions. Step 2. Trust your knowing of your child. Listen to him or her – listen with your ears, your heart, and your sensory guidance system. Step 3. Guide with strength and lovingkindness. Be self-confident and go with the flow. Be patient, kind, and firm. Say I am sorry, and make efforts to shift your responses to best meet you child’s needs. Model respect and trust by being respectful and trustworthy. In all your disciplinary responses focus on learning and loving; be loving and sensitive to the multi-level issues involved, respond quickly and clearly, and use the opportunity to teach joy and strength in being a responsible person; an individual connected to a community.
To help you embrace the three steps, understanding the nature of the parenting is key.
Parenting is modeled.
This means that you learn how to parent from your interpretation of your own parenting. This concept of learning social interactions through your group associations is a function of how the human brain develops over the first 24 years of life; and a part of what happens whenever you enter a new social group, environment.
What you see done is what you incorporate into doing to others and to yourself; as you age the internalized reflection of yourself becomes solidified. Once you are into middle age the malleability of your reflection, your internalized sel-persona/picture requires a release of the accepted self and a reevaluation of ‘who you are’… due to the solidified nature of your introjected self, often this requires a traumatic event to shift your internal accepted picture of self.
There is a strong desire to be accepted and approved of by your significant others (beginning with moms and dads, and then moving on to peers).
You know who you are and how you should be treated, what you perceive as your role in relationship, from what is reflected to you by your parents, your primary caregivers, and your first social groups –> your siblings and cousins, and then your peers, friends.
So, if there is dysfunction or trauma or damage in those early relationships you have deficits in your ability to navigate the waters of parenting your children.
Cognitive/behavioral therapy, meditation, yoga, and mindfulness development uplevel your consciousness so that you can shift and rebalance your inner self perception and your outer actions.
Trust, be trustworthy, act with strength and kindness, be forgiving and persevering.
As you guide, be willing to incorporate new information about your child or your beliefs and make adjustments to your course to align your actions, beliefs/values, and your parenting.
Parenting is a dynamic, organic (as in living and responsive to environmental changes) process.
Be confident, proactive, reflective, flexible, and trustworthy in your actions and intentions.
Be willing to adjust your response and be flexible as you see the need to do so and be firm when you perceive this is important.
Respond with seriousness to serious problems, and playfulness with problems which are not serious; stay responsive and discern the difference.in love and light, bg
The Path to Grace is a journey that cycles between these two steps.
These 4 simple phrases assist you in this recovery path, which I call the Path to Grace.
Stop, look, and listen. It is the perfect mantra to create the neutral, present moment, open-minded perspective required for moving through roadblocks. Stop the harmful behavior; look at your thoughts, beliefs, feelings, and actions, to discern what may be underneath your resistance; listen to you heart, tone, whole language to comprehend an underlying covert message.
The attitude of gratitude. Identify the gifts of your history, your drama, and your shift into recovery. Reaffirm your choice for health. Focus on your strengths, reframe your limitations. The attitude of gratitude creates an inner structure of resilient positive self-esteem rooted in a solid foundation.
Focus on what you want rather than what you fear. This mindful mantra directs your attention to precisely where you have power. Things feared tend to be things unknown that are out of your control. An inner locus of control puts the resilience, power to create, and basic capacity to respond to whatever comes your way into your own hands, so that you believe, have faith and have evidence that you can create what you want.
Be the Change You Wish to See in the World. This is a phrase made famous by M. Gandhi. He was interested in major social change, but this phrase is just as useful in small social worlds. Act mindfully, show respect, be loving, and compassionate as a style of being in the world. Live your change in every cell of your being, allowing breath, faith, forgiveness, and lovingkindness direct your actions and personal relationships, beginning with your relationship with yourself. Covey called this change Have to Be, which is to say focus on being what you want to have (Covey, 7 Habits of Highly Successful People, 1989).
Keeping these simple mantras close to your heart and mind will increase your capacity for mindfulness. This will increase your experience of compassion, harmony, and balance in living, and keep you on the recovery Path to Grace. Namaste, in love and light, bg
Anger, fear, discouragement, and insecurity have oxidative properties to your spirit, mind and body. When you choose a path that brings you strength, empowerment, joy, and confidence you are creating anti-oxidant properties that regenerate your cells, your thinking power, and your spiritual health.
This is a natural outcome of mindfulness and mindful meditation, focused breathwork, and heart or breath-led yoga practice.
I have a neighbor who cannot let go of any perceived injury. She plots and plans to get back at any individual who in her mind has ‘injured’ her. These perceived injuries feel very painful to her. Her face carries the look of a person who has been in battle for many years; deep furrows between her brows as if in a perpetual frown, loose skin that has deep furrows around her mouth make her look as if she is angry when she is at rest. Strangely, or perhaps understandably because she is always looking for injury, she has difficulty with any service professional who comes into her home… either she feels they are cheating her or they overcharge her or they do not correctly complete every job assigned. This spills off onto the constant negative, fearful energy of her constantly, fearfully barking tiny dog who seems to be in a constant panic attack. This woman actually has a great deal of prosperity in her life which she appears to not receive any comfort from. She owns her home and another rental (of course her tenants are always taking advantage of her from her perspective), has a good job and a nice retirement pension coming her way…. yet she is not happy – she is rich in things but poor in her sense of wealth and her style of relating in the world.
This is an example of how the oxidative energy of vengefulness, anger, and dissatisfaction are wearing away at her wellbeing. She cannot experience the comfort she actually has, and her face and body show the signs of advanced aging so that she looks older than her years. Even when she chooses to smile the anger and dissatisfaction comes through.
This kind of energy so close to my own home can be destabilizing. It can spill off onto my space and my interactions. The first step in dealing with such a being is to remember that defensiveness ties you into the negative path, so use the verbal aikido methods of deflection of the tone and negative behavior, deflation of the negative energy, and then definition of how you desire to act regardless of her actions. This is choosing the path that brings you joy
Regardless of another’s choice you are free to choose your own way. If another indeed is harming you or injuring you with his or her actions, taking a step to set it right is good. Do so with a lack of vengefulness or anger in your ideation, intention, and action. This will keep your cells vibrant, your face and voice and heart glowing and bring prosperity to you. This is healthy living and results in vibrant health in your spirit,mind, and body.
If you have been drawn in to a difficult relationship. Give yourself a chance to re-choose and to set your intention on this joyful path.
You can always choose a different path, a different response.
Consider this if you are feeling discouraged with previous choices which turned out less than well…
When are able to act in this loving responsible way, even saying you’re sorry when you make a mistake and resetting your plan, you teach your children to be resilient, flexible and truly responsible… and you build your own inner resilience.
Choose this anti-oxidant style of living in every interaction and you will see the positive results in your health and wealth… you may even be able to turn back the hands of time in how you are aging. Namaste, in love and light, bg
For those of you who follow how the stars in the heavens affect your inner pulsations and energies, this is a difficult time with Uranus and Pluto in a direct square. Often this results in a flash of change through a flash of catastrophe or a flash of insight like an Aha experience. This is like the Tower card in the Tarot.
What is useful to remember is that following the Tower is the The star which is all about renewal.
First destruction or revolution and then rebuilding anew… stronger, better, with more clarity.
This process has been ongoing for a year now with two previous meetings of these planets coinciding with challenging events in our society and culture and there are four more to go over the next two years… this process is necessary; like forest fires bringing new growth and prosperity in nature, so can these traumatic and insightful shifts offer opportunities for growth and change to your societal and personal structures.
I have been in a process of deep renewal that has felt like living within the Tower card for the last two and a half months. It has been a powerful experience to see through the fear, difficulty, and challenges to identify the irrepressible seeds of new growth in my core self. This process has brought to me a revolution of my core being…. how I respond to the pressures of society, group expectations, my perceived internalized values, and my personal needs; how I view my place in the world; what I perceive to be my core strengths and my core limitations; and what is the focus of my life-soul-plan. For me, this has been a mixof painful release, letting go – like a weeding out of misbeliefs and mis-directed strategies and a healing attraction, health promoting, and strengthening of my true authentic self and inspiration. I have been living through the energies of a mix of the Tower and the Star – destruction and renewal.
If you have been experiencing this too, then you are aware that to move through this process with the least amount of pain and the highest degree of renewal: What matters is how you respond to the catastrophe or insight.
The process of meditation, and mindfulness can guide you. Accepting truth while simultaneously letting go of misbeliefs takes a willingness to focus your mindful attention and observation upon yourself.
That which causes you fear may be the key.
Make an effort to understand whether the fear is something dangerous that you must fight against or a sense of not knowing, a sense of something unfamiliar that may indeed portend a cleansing away of debris and inauthenticity and a deeper connection to your true self.
Be kind to yourself, kind and loving. Embrace the change, go with the flow, see the beauty and the gifts in the shifting internal landscape. This will offer you that sense of peace so that you can experience the power in the renewal and the beauty in your authentic self.
Connection to spirit is the most useful tool at this time. Spirit in any form that has valence and meaning to you.
The following phrases can be helpful. Jot these down to remind you of the positive power in your shifting environment. Tether yourself so that you can feel the strength of the tree, rooted, and the height of your spirit. Even if you are feeling pulled at your very roots like the image of the Tower know that Renewal follows and allows a rebuilding process that makes you truly stronger and more flexible.
May you live in interesting times (Robert Kennedy, 1966 originally attributed as a chinese curse but this is not corroborated in Chinese studies)
For those with much to offer, much is expected. (To those whom much is given, much is expected. John F. Kennedy)
Be Grateful for the problems you have, See what gifts are set inside of them. My own inspiration.
In the center of health is heal… pay attention to how you focus your energy.
The opposite of evil is live. Shifting your perspective helps, heals, and creates connection.
Fear and love cannot take up the same space, choose love, choose joy, release fear and insecurity –> this allows you to live free, to call the renewal to you. This moves you away from the pain of the destruction, the despair of destruction toward revolution and renewal. This is the pattern of scientific, social, and personal revolutions – paradigm shifting-that creates self, relationship, and society anew. Namaste. in love and light, bg
“Be like a tree” when under stress. Allow your roots to dig deeply into the earth and ground you. Allow your branches, and trunk to sway with the pressure of the wind. Know that your center is strong and holds you stable as you flexibly respond to the assault and pressure of the storm. In this way you will find peace and resilience, inner knowing, strength, security, and flexibility so that you are not torn asunder and bereft.
“Be like water ” when in danger or working with tender beings. Gently yet with perseverance flow, guide, assist, and lightly wash away that which does not serve yourself or others. In this way you will find peace and resilience, inner guidance, clarity, strength, security, flexibility, and truth so that propaganda and ill-will cannot affect you.
In all things patience, action, attitude and intention matter. Feel the joy in every moment and your heart will sing, Namaste, in love and light, bg
In honor of Mother’s Day, I wanted to share two poetic experiences of motherhood for me.
Max and Beautiful Alien (kate). I am so lucky to understand the world of mother through Birthing and Grafting to my family tree… These beings filling my mothering world with joy, challenge, and satisfaction.
Max
Secretly, I want to hold you here
Keep you right here with me
Never let you go.
I want this moment to be held in time.
This perfect moment,
When my dreams come true in a kaleidoscope of joy.
Waiting
my whole life Before I knew you,
Before I knew myself really;
I have been waiting this whole time to hear you call me MOM
And now this moment has happened.
This joy, so profound, I don’t want to let go.
I don’t want the next moment to come.
I want time —————– Suspended.
Perfection transforms into the mundane.
The miracle
creates a new world;
opens a reality that changes everything;
Creates it’s own time-suspension through transformation.
what was
no longer
is
Joy like an inner smile, constantly warming me, knows only the new world.
What we created transformed us both;
Birthed us each anew
to this perfect brave new world.
beth gineris
Beautiful Alien
(kate mary sophia)
This being in my belly grows
She consumes my energy
Transforming each molecule into her growth
I am struck by her sheer, survivalistic nature
driven,
just taking what she needs to grow.
As for me I graciously give, in a protective, one-minded sort of way,
Through a deep feeling of care and maternalistic nature
Dissociating myself from my own needs in order to first meet hers.
Thank god for the chemicals in my brain that endear her to me
Without that, my body might dispose of her, interpret her a parasite…
Like a caterpillar engorging himself with each green life he touches
Building energy to transform
So does she devour whatever energy available, taking from my reserve if necessary
This process of development is deeply ingrained in my being
Stored in the center of each cell
Awakened by the first want of her
Never to be extinguished.
Her conception
Creates me as the chrysalis,
transforming not just one being but two.
I now understand the plight of the caterpillar driven forward
Toward his destiny of metamorphosis.
I too feel the hardening of the walls
The change looming
Until I am someone
Not previously here…
Forever changed into Mother
Never to be the other again.
beth gineris
What fun to mark mother’s day with remembrance of the power of caring, and the inter-transformational effect of mother and child….write a poem for yourself to mark the beauty of your relationship either with your mother or your child; this exercise can shift your perspective positively. In love and light, Namaste, bg
I am excited to share about a new book out there called I Believe: When What you Believe Matters! by Eldon Taylor. What I like about it is that it offers lots of studies and examples of how your beliefs drive what you create. It has a lot of the great tools found in Esther Hicks’ books but with a scientific component that really brings substance to the material.
Everyone is extolling praises for this book, including famous personalities such as Lindsay Wagner, John Gray, Ph.D., James Van Praagh, Larry Dossey, M.D., and Stanely Krippner, Ph.D. I know you will find this book valuable, both personally and for your own business.
The information in this book is consistent with the information you find in my writings about the importance of congruence in your thinking and actions and mindfulness.
I Believe: When What You Believe Matters! reveals the importance of choosing your every life belief and the effects these choices have on the quality of your life, impacting areas that may surprise you in ways you have not thought of. Eldon Taylor even shows how these belief choicepoints can influence how long you will live and how your DNA expresses itself. Your belief paradigms affect what you will allow yourself to see and hear; each belief effecting many consequences.
He talks about it like a spider web that continually builds upon itself often trapping us where we don’t want to be.
I hope you get a chance to check out this new book. It’s got a lot of great stuff in it about how your thinking defines your being. It’s like a type of spiritual sociology. Enjoy, bg
Mindfulness is a way of living, not just thinking. When you allow your actions, thinking, and speaking to be in congruence with each other you are living in an integrated, mindful, being state.
This is faith guided by your heart center and supported by your mind. This faith is not a religious ferver driven by fear, control, and urgency, but rather a calm inner knowing that is balanced, relaxed and guided by love, patience, and compassion.
The challenge with being congruent is to recognize where and how you are out of sync. Malcolm Gladwell in his book Blink, the Power of Thinking without Thinking (2005), identifies the properties of discernment fully available to you, which you ignore. These are messages from within of inconsistencies in speaking, thinking, and action.
Practicing mindfulness offers a simple way to recognize your personal incongruence and that of those with whom you interact. You discover this when you listen with your inner third ear, and see with your inner third eye: these reference using your integrated internal sensory guidance system, your five senses plus intuition to see, hear, feel, and know the way (Turning ME to WE: The Art of Partnering with Mindfulness, Gineris, 2013)
The Tao Te Ching attributed to Taoist thinker Lao Tzu, represents a guide to reorient your focus toward balance.
The supreme good is like water,
which nourishes all things without trying to.
It is content with the low places that people disdain.
Thus it is like the Tao.
In dwelling, live close to the ground.
In thinking, keep to the simple.
In conflict, be fair and generous.
In governing, don’t try to control.
In work, do what you enjoy.
In family life, be completely present.
When you are content to be simply yourself
and don’t compare or compete,
everybody will respect you.
— Lao Tzu, Tao Te Ching
This last phrase is the one that speaks to me, …content to be simply yourself and don’t compare or compete... it speaks to me in relation to the fight being started not by the first rock thrown but by the defensive action in return….this is supported through Buddhism and Christianity to not take offense, to turn the other cheek, and by Judaism to forgive. This lack of comparison and competition is the fastest way to move out of Me, narcissism, through I, competition into the place of We, collaboration and connection so that all people have the power and freedom to uplevel consciousness and create a space for Peace in strength for all peoples. This is a result of the undeniable power of truth. Truth is. It plumbs directly into you and through your integrated system. It has the capacity to reveal hidden agendas and incongruent beliefs. As you allow yourself to stand in the center of your being as simply yourself you will experience increased strength and resilience and a light, calm, loving attitude toward all your relations. This aligns you and sets your course so that you are in sync in you actions, thinking, and speech.
join me in cheerfully being simply yourself without comparison and competition and notice the respect, love, and connection you experience in your every day interactions and life; in love and light, bg
Gladwell, Malcolm. Blink: The Power of Thinking without Thinking. New York: Little, Brown and Company, 2005.
LaoTzu, Tao Te Ching. Stephen Mitchell, trans. New York: Harper and Row, 1988.
Being a spirit-human, challenges you in the realms of faith and fear. Fear is what drives your lower chakra survival mentality. Faith is what drives your upper chakra thriving spirit. This is Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs Pyramid (1954, 1990) and the idea of moving from Me through I to We in how you perceive your power, relationships, and environment.
You see/experience what you believe, and you believe what you see/experience. Fair enough.
If you feel fear but desire to shift into faith you need to activate your upper chakras and balance your lower chakras. You can do this through intentional action. In order to shift your perception, you have to move out of fear-based, survivalistic, limited resources perspective into a joy-based, thriver, perspective of faith. Faith being the knowing that you will be what you desire if you do not get in your own way with fear.
Faith, love, joy expand your experience; these expand your access to creation in the positive, seeing collaborative solutions, and recognition of your full power.
Fear, hate, and despair limit your experience; these diminish your access to creation in the positive, cloud/impair your vision, and reduce your recognition of your power and solutions.
Try this simple exercise to feel the difference.
frown.
breathe shallowly
look for every possible negative attribute or impediment to your desire
read about the many tragedies and heartbreaks in making changes
greet others with a negative attitude certain that they will work against you; redirect yourself to the (-)
at the end of 24 hours of this set of actions, note how you feel – you will notice you feel constricted, fearful, small, discouraged, heavy, tired, fatigued, and isolated – you may want to eat sugar, drink alcohol, or pick a fight with our children or partner.
Now, try this simple exercise to feel the difference
smile.
breathe deeply
look for every possible positive action or path to your desire
read about the many joyful and heart-filled experiences in making changes
greet others with a positive attitude, certain that they will work to your advantage; redirect yourself to the (+)
at the end of 24 hours of this set of actions, note how you feel – you will notice an expansion, a sense of courage, feeling bigger, joyful, light, energized, and connected – you may want to eat fruits and vegetables, whole, healthy food, to juice, eat protein, and drink water; you will have more energy to understand our child’s or partner’s needs and feel they are present for you and you are more available to them.
Faith or Fear, the choice is yours.
The outcome is defined by which you choose – which outcome would you prefer to create? in love and light, bg
Maslow, A.H. Motivation and Personality. NewYork: Harper, 1954. Gineris, B. Turning ME to WE: The Art of Partnering with Mindfulness. Charleston, SC: Createspace, 2013.
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