When your immune system is down. Think about how you can shift your nutrition and build in meditation yoga and stress management — these are your best treatments to build immune.
Crazy simple: sleep, exercise, good food, and breathwork are best at healing your body.
In terms of nutrition focus on dark berries, dark leafy greens, quinoa, eggs, dark beans, and white beans.
In terms of supplements – D3, a good B stress, like B100- which includes b2, b4, b6, b12, niacin and folic acid, C with rosewood and cranberry to assist in intake.
If you are a vegetarian make sure you get iron (you can take a plant based supplement called floradex) and zinc (make sure you get a formula that has the proper zinc and copper relationship or chelated zinc) These can assist you.
Vegetarianism is a great way to get nutrition- you just have to be good at getting enough protein and immune support from beans, chickpeas, berries and yogurt (if you are not lactose intolerant — yogurt is my go to every day to help stay balanced and get protein and digestive enzymes naturally).
Emotions, and lack of spiritual grounding and connection can negatively affect your immune system, that’s the reason for making sure you are participating in stress reducing activities like yoga, meditation, breathwork, and exercise in a balanced way, every day.
Your health is an integrated thing: mind, spirit and body — all three together – good food sustains your body and helps with balanced thinking and spirit source connection – so does breathwork and exercise prayer and meditation – it isn’t usually one thing but all together in harmony that maintain your health.
You can find out more – just search this site for: 4×4 habits for health. Spirit, mind, body, community.
There are many articles on balancing spirit mind and body, and resetting your thinking.
Spirit : breath, meditation, yoga, Qi gong, connection to your natural inner senses as sensory guidance system.
Mind: stress reduction, cognitive retraining, forgiveness, gratitude, paradigm shifting. Reducing anxiety and shifting depressive thinking.
Body: food, water, rest, and exercise
Community offers connection and Rejuvenation
Best supplements identified above as well as inositol hexaphosphates and inositol
Best yoga position – find yoga strategies for health, check out this site for more information about how yoga and health are related.
And finally, if you feel sad, apathetic, lost, out of sync, unable to find your way in the world, consider creating space in your life, every day, to return to nature.
Hike in the mountains, walk on the beach, take a walk through the park. Swing on a swing, ride a bike..reconnect to nature all around you. You can feel this even through the plants in your lobby or on your windowsill.
The more you allow yourself the opportunity to reconnect with nature, the more likely you will feel a release of negativity and an inner communication that you may have earlier silenced so that you can again or for the first time feel deeply connected to the tapestry of life.
The trees inhale your carbon dioxide and exhale oxygen. You inhale oxygen and exhale Carbon dioxide. We, the trees and humans, animals, birds, are all interconnected in one tapestry of life. Part of the intense degree of disconnect seen in the field of mental health is the severe disconnection humans experience from the natural sense communication in nature. Go out into nature and you can begin again to develop your internal sensory guidance senses first with the five plus one senses of sight, smell, taste, sound, touch and intuition, and then as you develop your sense awareness these will expand tenfold.
With these actions you will discover your own personal path to grace.
Find out more about this in future writings on this blog and through my new book, Instinctive Health Medicine, Finding Your Path to Grace, due out in July 2016.
You can find out more at http://www.bethgineris.com. Beth’s upcoming book, 6 steps to transcending conflict and elevating consciousness, due out in 2015 offers special techniques for releasing unresolved injuries…and the elevation of consciousness.
You may participate in seminars to learn these techniques through the bethgineris.com. Beth’s groundbreaking book Turning Me to WE: The Art of Partnering with Mindfulness(2013), has some great tools about Temperament style and your personal style of partnering, as well as the insecurity Drivers MAAPS. Discover how your worldview works to your benefit or detriment, and whether you have an attachment that is creating problems in your relationships. MAAPS will help you to discern your insecurities and understand how and what underlies how you developed your insecurity driver (Money, Achievement, Attachment, Power, Structure).
You can find ways to simply connect to yourself in a loving forgiving way through theTurning No to ON: The Art of Parenting with Mindfulness Book (2011). If you want to change your life, see how you can bring mindfulness to your parenting and relationships.
One being at a time you can elevate the way in which you treat one another and elevate the consciousness on the planet so that equality, balance, and freedom BEcome the norm for all. in love and light, bg
When you feel you are hitting a wall in your relationships consider the difference in these four concepts in how you respond to the blockage.
Break down: it’s like a flat tire. You stop. You cannot move forward or backward. You’re in a stagnant, sometimes involuting situation. This leads to disease, disconnection, and stagnation. Following a break down you can discover a way to break through.
Break up: complete disconnection. Separation. Detached, unattached. This can be very positive when there is a stalled situation that has no mutually satisfying resolution.
Break out: again disconnection, freeing from a tethering or prison or domination. Following a Break out you may be able to discern a break through.
Break through: This is an elevation. A shift in consciousness. In this phrase there is a freeing from a tethering of inner belief that is holding you back. Breaking through requires mindfulness and paradigm shifting.
If you are in a situation that has stalled, where you are experiencing a need for change or a revolving unresolved conflict…consider which of these is your best action.
You can get there from here…when you use the phrase break through you have the chance of reclaiming yourself, reconnecting with your partner, and shifting the world in which you live simultaneously…how great is that? in love and light, bg
You can find out more at http://www.bethgineris.com. Beth’s upcoming book, 6 steps to transcending conflict and elevating consciousness, due out in 2015 offers special techniques for releasing unresolved injuries..
You may participate in seminars to learn these techniques through the bethgineris website. Beth’s groundbreaking book Turning Me to WE: The Art of Partnering with Mindfulness(2013), has some great tools about Temperament style and your personal style of partnering, as well as the insecurity Drivers MAAPS. Discover where you are in the Temperament and the MAAPS section. You can see how you see the world, and whether you have an attachment that is creating problems in your relationships. MAAPS will help you to discern your insecurities and understand how and what underlies how you developed your insecurity driver (Money, Achievement, Attachment, Power, Structure).
You can find ways to simply connect to yourself in a loving forgiving way through theTurning No to ON: The Art of Parenting with Mindfulness Book (2011).If you want to change your life, see how you can bring mindfulness to your parenting and relationships.
One being at a time you can elevate the way in which you treat one another and elevate the consciousness on the planet so that equality, balance, and freedom BEcome the norm for all. Go outside, reconnect with your center with a walk in nature. in love and light, bg
I wanted to share a positive message about how the universe can and does respond to intention and attention.
My daughter wanted to go to the St James Tearoom.
It’s a fancy luncheon place that serves old-fashioned tea sandwiches dressed in cream cheese, cucumbers and flowers, with biscuits and clotted cream.
It is one of her favorite things to do.
She wanted to go with her dad and he rescheduled his afternoon patients just to take her.
He knows how fast children grow up. he remembers the day his son preferred the company of his friends to him, and he just wasn’t ready for that yet with this one…not yet.
Granted we have been lucky, our son stayed close by through college to really eek out the last bits of play with my husband and me. But it is still hard to let go. To see them grow. To watch them do precisely what we are teaching them to do — become their best self and have full and happy adventures in far away places…
It was a beautiful afternoon, a slight breeze in the air. As they were getting out of the car my daughter noticed something in the drain by the curb…she ran over to it and with her most precious smile presented to her dad a hundred dollar bill.
She was delighted. He was dumbfounded.
She had been saving for something special. And now she had found a hundred dollar bill. She felt very lucky. She was. She had a lovely tea and enjoyed all the festivities. When their time was up she took home her uneaten desserts and her special find.
The power of this story is exemplified in her simple belief that the world will provide that which she needs, without question.
Esther Hicks/Abraham encourage each of us to simply ‘ask and it is given'(Hicks, 2004). The Law of Attraction as she calls the energetic law of the universe referencing that what you attend to, what you put your energy into is what you will receive. When you find yourself stuck it is a result of you simultaneously putting energy into releasing something that no longer has value while also holding to it. You allow fear to have a voice as loud as faith. When this happens the energy of both are sent your way and your resulting experience is a lack of movement, or no change.
I see this often when I work with couples. Each party is holding to resentments, or habits, or fears while also saying he or she desires to release it and move forward. They find themselves in the same argument. They reflect and trigger each other’s fear and reactivity. This is a waste of energy. Not simply a waste of energy in the argument but also a waste of the use of your attention and intention the pathway to focus energy toward the creation of your desire.
Each of you reading this can have the same experience of money simply showing up in your life (growing on trees, ready for you to pluck like fruit and receive).
Here are the simple steps to make it so:
Take a breath, exhale and clear your mind.
Visualize what you desire.
Hold the visualization clear in your heart and mind for 30 seconds free of negativity or attachment to the process (reasons it cannot happen or ways it should happen or how you will feel hurt if it doesn’t happen).
Take a deep breath and as you exhale release your desire as you would a butterfly.
Write down what you saw and desire onto a piece of paper and put it in a box you keep near your bed while you sleep.
You may do this as often as you like.
When you gaze upon the box say a prayer that all that is good will come to you.
To strengthen the power of this process
Live your life with an open heart and a mindful attitude. Keep negative beliefs out of your daily thought patterns.
Consciously release thoughts and habit patterns that do not serve you.
Forgive.
Be compassionate toward yourself and others.
Be mindful: When you are struggling, look at the problem within the context of that which is good in our life.
In these difficult times I find myself and others forgetting the power in prayer. The power of faith and knowing. The power of clear intention and attention. I like to remind myself and those I love that the universe is working for me, I just have to get out of the way and let the good I have created flow to me. I wish the absolute best to you. in love and light, bg
You can find out more at http://www.bethgineris.com. Beth’s upcoming book, 6 steps to transcending conflict and elevating consciousness, due out in 2014 offers special techniques for releasing unresolved injuries…and the elevation of consciousness.
You may participate in seminars to learn these techniques through the bethgineris.com. Beth’s groundbreaking book Turning Me to WE: The Art of Partnering with Mindfulness(2013), has some great tools about Temperament style and your personal style of partnering, as well as the insecurity Drivers MAAPS. Discover where you are in the Temperament and the MAAPS section. You can see how you see the world, and whether you have an attachment that is creating problems in your relationships. MAAPS will help you to discern your insecurities and understand how and what underlies how you developed your insecurity driver (Money, Achievement, Attachment, Power, Structure).
You can find ways to simply connect to yourself in a loving forgiving way through theTurning No to ON: The Art of Parenting with Mindfulness Book (2011).
If you want to change your life, see how you can bring mindfulness to your parenting and relationships.
One being at a time you can elevate the way in which you treat one another and elevate the consciousness on the planet so that equality, balance, and freedom BEcome the norm for all. in love and light, bg
As you develop through your life you emphasize and de-emphasize different aspects of who you ARE – your multi-layer-self.
Your multi-layer-self is comprised of your spiritual, emotional/cognitive, physical self.
This is especially true as you move through the decades of your life and it follows a specific course. You get the opportunity to actually grow a new skin, and develop into a fuller more balanced personality or self every ten years or so…
Each decade offers you a new perspective and it gives you a chance to incorporate what you have learned in the past in a whole new way…I think of this as discarding your outgrown old skin and growing a new skin.
In the earliest aspect of your life 0-10 years you are developing the foundation of how you see yourself:what matters to you and how you want to be connected to those around you.
This is the beginning of your lifelong relationship with how you get what you want and how you make a place for yourself with others… this requires balance.
At first your neediness may be the focus and boundaries are set from an outside source. As you move through this decade you develop internalized boundaries that assist you in managing your needs and the expectations or wants of your group.
If you had injuries, abandonment, deficiencies in how your early environment responded to your needs then you will develop an over-developed dependence on yourself (so rigid boundaries) <the I-style of relationship in MAAPS*> or an over-dependence on others (so enmeshed boundaries) <the me-style of relationship in MAAPS*> .
When this occurs your development in the decades that follow will have a skew toward rigidity, difficulty connecting at a deep level or enmeshment (what some call co-dependence) which also results in a difficulty to connect at a deep level in relationship.
These difficulties look different in relationship but skew out from the same place…inner insecurity and imbalance.
If you had a balanced set of love and discipline in the first ten years of life you will have a basic flexibility in how you manage getting what you want and pleasing those whom you call family and friends.
This grows in depth and breadth throughout the next decades and you will find yourself having the internal strength to focus your life toward goals while simultaneously creating loving relationships.
The decade of 10 – 20 years offers a new level of managing your internal focus and boundaries. This is biologically a time when relationship outside your family of origin begins to have greater importance. You determine what aspects of your familial groups and group constructs are in alignment with your goals and perspectives of the world and yourself.
This is where you benefit from an early life that included a sense of freedom and boundaries in balance. When you have this in balance you are flexible in how you negotiate care of yourself and care of others. Additionally, you have a more grounded sense of your assets and limitations which supports you creating goals that are within your reach and goals that promote a sense of positivity and empowerment within you and your community.
If you have somehow skewed off into a me-style or I-style of relationship, then you have to develop inner security, empathy and boundaries. This is the work of the decades 20-30 and for those of you who are from the 90s and 2000 generation this may incorporate the decade of 30-40.
Here a sense of spirit is good to discuss.
A loss of faith has hit a lot of the millennium generation…loss of faith in elders, in the world at large, even in the purpose of living on the planet. This has resulted in a sense of being out of balance with the world around them.
In order to reconnect with yourself, in relationship or/and with your community you must reconnect with your sense of spirit.
Try to avoid the trap of hearing religion or god-practice for right now…
Think about the concept of Lovingkindness, embrace the true reality that we are all connected — all human communities, all life beings on the planet…even the planet itself to each of us…and the planets in our universe to our planet and us…
You can find this in reconnecting to your internal sensory guidance system..your 5 + 1 senses …your senses of seeing, tasting, feeling, smelling, hearing and intuition..these are your perfect guides to what path to take. These are your proof in this interconnectedness and your sense of spirit.
Once you allow your sensory guidance system to chart your course then your relationships become mutually empowering and your faith returns. By listening and responding to your 5 + 1 senses you create goals that fill you with strength, resilience and joy. You will naturally use empathy, inner security, and boundaries to map your life.
Here you will be emphasizing both your internal needs and goals and your external group requirements with a sense of unification and faith. in love and light, bg
Remember you have a better chance of getting where you want to go if you have a map…in love and light, many blessings, bg
You can find out more at http://www.bethgineris.com. Beth’s upcoming book, 6 steps to transcending conflict and elevating consciousness, due out in 2014 offers special techniques for releasing unresolved injuries..
You may participate in seminars to learn these techniques through the bethgineris website. Beth’s groundbreaking book Turning Me to WE: The Art of Partnering with Mindfulness(2013), has some great tools about Temperament style and your personal style of partnering, as well as the insecurity Drivers MAAPS. Discover where you are in the Temperament and the MAAPS section. You can see how you see the world, and whether you have an attachment that is creating problems in your relationships. MAAPS will help you to discern your insecurities and understand how and what underlies how you developed your insecurity driver (Money, Achievement, Attachment, Power, Structure).
You can find ways to simply connect to yourself in a loving forgiving way through theTurning No to ON: The Art of Parenting with Mindfulness Book (2011).If you want to change your life, see how you can bring mindfulness to your parenting and relationships.
One being at a time you can elevate the way in which you treat one another and elevate the consciousness on the planet so that equality, balance, and freedom BEcome the norm for all. in love and light, bg
One of the coolest aspects of the MAAPSguiding principles of relationship is how easily you can discern what is driving how you behave in relationship.
This is beneficial when HOW you are behaving is interfering with you getting what you want.
MAAPS is an easy way to remember the five guiding security principles of relationship:Money, Achievement, Attachment (Connection), Power, and Structure.
One or more of these are engaged when YOU are driven or compelled to act inauthentically in relationship to create a sense of safety in one of these areas. And when you are acting under the influence of one or more of these drivers you create immature, and unfulfilling relationships.
In order to shift away from this you have to face your insecurity: You have to tolerate feeling insecure while asking for what you truly need or want in the relationship.
For example: if you fear, or have an insecurity around attachment or feeling connected, you might create yourself as less important than the other person; putting his needs ahead of yours and attempting to get your needs met on the side.
This is a reasonable solution in the short-term, however after a while this will feel as if the other person is taking advantage of you or that your needs are not as important; this can lead to resentment within you and create a crevasse in the foundation of the relationship that may ultimately tear the relationship apart.
An alternative action is to speak about what you are feeling as soon as you identify it is happening. You may want to do some undercover work with your self to discern what may be underlying the insecurity. You can look into what decisions you may have made about how you HAD to actto be loved or cared for or to feel SAFE in your early childhood or early relationships.
More often these drivers act under the surface. You actually are not aware of the influence the insecurity has over your actions.
So here are some clues that you are under the influence of insecurity:
you have difficulty co-mingling funds
you have difficulty sharing title for achievements
you have difficulty being alone or you feel abandoned when you cannot immediately contact your partner
you have difficulty receiving assistance from others or you have difficulty when others don’t do what you tell them to do
you have difficulty when there is disorganization
Insecurity can be hidden. I know many individuals who on the surface appear strong and confident, yet the insecurity is lurking just beneath the surface. When left undetected and unresolved, this insecurity can interfere with you getting what you truly want in your personal and career life.
If you notice that you have trouble maintaining healthful and meaningful relationships, investigate whether you have ann insecurity in one of the five guiding security principles in relationship. Use your compassion, lovingkindness, forgiveness, and mindfulness tools to assist you in releasing the insecurity belief so that you can build inner security and engage in more mutually beneficial relationships.
You can learn more about this in earlier blogs on this site or through the following books.
Remember you have a better chance of getting where you want to go if you have a map…in love and light, many blessings, bg
You can find out more at http://www.bethgineris.com. Beth’s upcoming book, 6 steps to transcending conflict and elevating consciousness, due out in 2014 offers special techniques for releasing unresolved injuries..
You may participate in seminars to learn these techniques through the bethgineris website. Beth’s groundbreaking book Turning Me to WE: The Art of Partnering with Mindfulness(2013), has some great tools about Temperament style and your personal style of partnering, as well as the insecurity Drivers MAAPS. Discover where you are in the Temperament and the MAAPS section. You can see how you see the world, and whether you have an attachment that is creating problems in your relationships. MAAPS will help you to discern your insecurities and understand how and what underlies how you developed your insecurity driver (Money, Achievement, Attachment, Power, Structure).
You can find ways to simply connect to yourself in a loving forgiving way through theTurning No to ON: The Art of Parenting with Mindfulness Book (2011).If you want to change your life, see how you can bring mindfulness to your parenting and relationships.
One being at a time you can elevate the way in which you treat one another and elevate the consciousness on the planet so that equality, balance, and freedom BEcome the norm for all. in love and light, bg
Most of you recognize that the integration of spirit, mind, and body is a multi-level, multi-phase experience. It is dynamic, changing responsively to your inner and outer environment.
Recent events have further elucidated for me the subtleties of this dynamic process.
Participating in a fifty mile race after three weeks on the bike. To my surprise while participating in the long ride, I began to feel unable to continue…my friends encouraged me to use my yogic breath and my experience of inner peace to press on… Ultimately I noticed it was my will that gave me the strength to continue.
Re-training myself for a distance swim for my first triathlon sprint. During the swim training, I discovered an underlying degree of anxiety that was exacerbated by loss of breath — it projected me right back to an earlier event of almost being choked when I was raped as a teenager. It was shocking and almost uncontrollable to keep swimming – my body was fighting for life while I could clarify that it was not actually happening, my heartrate ramped up my breath became flat and labored…I couldn’t swim properly…Ultimately in the swim training it was my inner breath and my yogic training that assisted me in calming my fear and re-integrating myself into the now, to release the energy of the rape experience connected to ‘air-hunger’.
Having endured significant sexual harassment throughout my life, I have made significant efforts, with success, to clear the vestiges of effect from this trauma, and to eradicate the insecurities that could have colored how I interacted in relationship and partnership. This information is further explained in the section on MAAPS insecurity drivers in my book* Turning Me to We: the Art of Partnering with mindfulness.
These recent events focused how the trauma vestiges can effect your relationship with yourself.
As could be expected, the rape was the most problematic to clear. It was held within my psychic, emotional, and cognitive memory as well as my physical body. To this day I have a holding in my upper body that is still reminiscent of the position in which I was pinned down. This is not unusual for individuals who have survived a rape to have these various types of physical changes. I have had success in clearing this to a fairly deep level physically, emotionally, spiritually, and psychologically.
I have had the great fortune of applying mindfulness, psychotherapy, and forgiveness toward my history of harassment and the rape…as such I have created warm loving non-abusive relationships with my partner and friends. It is for this reason that I spend so much time training, teaching, and modeling mindfulness and forgiveness as part of a healthy lifestyle individually and in relationships/partnerships.
With this being stated, I was quite surprised by the deep level of fear and anxiety that exhibited in myself during the ride and swim training. It speaks to the depth of effect in the spirit, body, mind web that is within human consciousness; and how deeply trauma plumbs to the center of one’s being.
Humans are dynamic, multi-dimensional beings.
The process of clearing trauma can take years and releases in layers.
Trauma for one being may not be traumatic for another.
Spiritual trauma is the most debilitating, as spirit connects humans to the greater universe of energy. When spiritual trauma is directly bound with physical trauma, thinking can skew off into a place that could be described as ‘hell on earth’.
Over the years I have noted that individuals who have intense anxiety suffer far more than those around them…because they do not have the peace that comes with centeredness…the peace you experience with centered mindful meditation and breath.
The lesson of this recent athletic training is that each challenge requires an integrated spirt, body, mind response. And, that balance is affected by the vestiges of previous traumas or incorrect correlations of power.
Human beings are spiritually and willlfully driven.
It is your ego*/ will that can pull you through a difficult challenging task– that is where hard work and discipline are kings and queens.
And, it is your spiritual inner faith and knowing that is required in other challenges….
(ego as defined as the balanced mediator of your personality, mediator between id and superego – see Gineris, Turning Me to WE, The Art of Partnering with Mindfulness, p 186, Rebalancing: Empathy, Ego and Spirit).
The space between mindful breathing and will is the ground where all battles are fought. This is in a phrase then entirety of Sun Tzu’s The Art of War* * to know yourself, know your enemy, to know when to act and when to be quietly strong as you prepare to act….
Staying within the threshold of calm is an act of faith and will. Success requires both dynamically and rhythmically in play.
The practice of yoga can teach you this through your use of breath to move through challenges.
The practice of mindful meditation can teach you this as you breath yourself into neutrality, compassion and the now.
The practice of athletic training can teach you this if you understand the relationship between will and allowing, remaining centered in your integrated spirit, mind and body.
If you struggle with anxiety, use these practices to bring you into a more dynamic and flexible relationship with your will (discipline/Qi) and your faith (spirit/breath/Shen), you will find more peaceful and powerful successes in all you undertake to accomplish. Namaste, in love and light, bg
You can find out more at http://www.bethgineris.com. Even More outlined in Beth’s upcoming book, 6 steps to transcending conflict and elevating consciousness, due out in 2014. You may participate in seminars to learn these techniques through her website. This book is the HOW TO companion book to Turning Me to WE: The Art of Partnering with Mindfulness(2013). Discover where you are in the Temperament and the MAAPS section. You can see how you see the world, and whether you have an attachment that is creating problems in your relationships. MAAPS will help you to discern your insecurities and understand how and what underlies how you developed your insecurity driver (Money, Achievement, Attachment, Power, Structure). You can find ways to simply connect to yourself in a loving forgiving way through theTurning No to ON: The Art of Parenting with Mindfulness Book (2011).If you want to change your life, see how you can bring mindfulness to your parenting and relationships. One being at a time you can elevate the way in which you treat one another and elevate the consciousness on the planet so that equality, balance, and freedom BEcome the norm for all. in love and light, bg
Here are three easy steps to change your life in three weeks — and they only take minutes a day.
First, wake up one hour earlier…in the hour do 10 sun salutations. Leave 30 minutes earlier for your first appointment or check in time; when you get to your office or place of business– write down the three things you want to accomplish that day.
Second, build into your day three ten minute quiet spaces.
Third, change all your passwords to phrases that are positively empowering, express gratitude or encouragement. Every time you have to log into a site, open your computer or pay a bill and you write in your password…stop to breath and repeat the meaningful statement in your head with a sense of strength.
Do this for three weeks and you will have an increase in energy, money, and recognition.
I used this set of changes over the last five years and managed to write three books (almost finished with the fourth)… increase my income doing more of what I really love, healed my relationships in my family of origin and my chosen family…and most importantly increased my own self confidence, positive self perception, and clarified my daily interactions.
You can find out more at http://www.bethgineris.com. Even More outlined in Beth’s upcoming book, 6 steps to transcending conflict and elevating consciousness, due out in 2014. You may participate in seminars to learn these techniques through her website. This book is the HOW TO companion book to Turning Me to WE: The Art of Partnering with Mindfulness(2013). Discover where you are in the Temperament and the MAAPS section. You can see how you see the world, and whether you have an attachment that is creating problems in your relationships. MAAPS will help you to discern your insecurities and understand how and what underlies how you developed your insecurity driver (Money, Achievement, Attachment, Power, Structure). You can find ways to simply connect to yourself in a loving forgiving way through theTurning No to ON: The Art of Parenting with Mindfulness Book (2011).If you want to change your life, see how you can bring mindfulness to your parenting and relationships. One being at a time you can elevate the way in which you treat one another and elevate the consciousness on the planet so that equality, balance, and freedom BEcome the norm for all. in love and light, bg
Raising awareness is absolutely one of the best aspects of social media, be it twitter, instagram, facebook, etal.
Having spent half my life helping people discover what interferes with their success, and then doing something about it, I can strongly say that insight and awareness simply aren’t sufficient for real change.
Awareness that there is a problem is a necessary butinsufficient quality for real change
Hyped up social media awareness can sometimes actually overshadow the opportunities for creating a real change.
How can this be? Well, mostly because there are people who will use the excitement and drama to misdirect and amplify the issue without bringing real healing tools to the gathering. The democrats will blame the republicans, the republicans will blame the feminists… the (fill in the blank group) will assert their superiority over the other (fill in the blank group)…
….and instead of a deep, powerful conversation happening about misogyny and how women are being sexually harassed and the extent of demeaning actions towards women …
….and the underlying forces that create this acceptable behavior by society (the reasons are not due to one simple fact or group) it becomes an opportunity for propaganda about how a specific group has it all right, while another has it all wrong.
An aha experience of insight or awareness can lead to a quantum shift in consciousness or a healing crisis. With either of these, real change can happen.
There is some simplicity.
Rape is an aggressive, violent action that uses sex as a weapon.
Women’s bodies do not call out to be raped.
Glorifying rape; talking about women as objects rather than human; Showing images of women being brutalized and objectified – all of these actions create women as second class non-humans that are then set up to be raped, harassed, demeaned and overpowered.
Society glorifying the music industry and movie industry for their part in this creates the space for all women to be brutalized, sexually harassed, overpowered, and dispossessed of their innate humanity.
This isn’t a puritanical religious issue, this isn’t a conservative/liberal issue, this is a power issue mostly brought about by the groups in power. The ones that keep telling you they are there to protect you, and they are on women’s sides…old and new.
Breasts are sexualized and objectified separately from their human function; used in naked-girl magazines, disney cartoons, and by feminists as much as the religious groups.
Until it is seen as a natural, normal thing to breastfeed children in public and not have it be gross (because it has been overshadowed by the sexual aspect of breasts), women’s breasts will be seen as tantalizing and power objects by men and women alike.
#yesallwomen is a great idea, raising the consciousness of what women have to endure as girls, and young women and old women.
But many of the groups who have joined in the cause to get a piece of the action are the perpetrators that keep that trauma going for women.
Power is the issue.
Until women have a handle on how to be powerful in ways that don’t include the preconceived notion of these groups that are simply using women and their issues for their own political and power gain, real change is not going to happen. (And just a hint, it isn’t the power to walk around naked…it’s the power to be seen as powerful in their innate femininity).
If you want to help all women, stop glorifying the sexualization of children, the brutalization of women, stop passively going along with the cool game of overpowering women in ALL ways..how?
Stop buying those songs, speak out against them. Stop watching those movies, stop feeding the industries that keep women down, including, when applicable, feminists that say they are out to help women while putting down their own gender to create their own power structure.
Mothers raise boys and girls. Mothers teach their girls to take care and be authentic, and yes to be careful to not get raped…mothers need to raise boys to care for girls in a way that doesn’t put the onus on the girl to maintain her goodness. Fathers raise boys and girls. Fathers need to deal with the importance of teaching masculinity, without teaching that rape is okay, or that it is the girl’s responsibility to not get raped.
I am asking you to think, to be mindful in your anger, attitude, and righteousness in how you join into this discussion. Because for those of us who have been one of the #yesallwomen who have had to deal with rape, sexual harassment, work related and personally, it’s a painful, shame-filled wound, so the discussion, the raising of awareness needs to be real, helpful, and not harmful.
Elevate the conversation. Go further, find a way to work with that group you despise, let your real, true love and desire for healing be your guide, because then you will be having the kind of conversation that will result in the elevation of consciousness…and in that shift all women will be enlightened. #yesallwomen, and yesallmen; yes to all humans working together in love and light, bg
The negative effects of the masculinization of femininity. Part 3 of 3.
Dependent, apathetic, disconnected children. Adolescents and young adults are delaying stepping into a fully independent role in society while enjoying many rights at even younger ages.
I perceive the reticence of the millennium generation to avoid entering into responsible roles in society, delaying entering into adulthood through various avenues of remaining dependent on parents and institutions for support, healthcare and living expenses, the malaise, apathy and lack of focus by an increasing many of the youngest generation– I see all of these serious issues as part of the side effects of the course that feminism has taken.
Feminism has created an environment where men aren’t needed in caring for children. The way in which the feminist movement has focused on elevating women has resulted in minimizing, even eradicating the role of men in caring for and raising children; even issues of providing financially for children has fallen to the state, leaving men to be outcast with respect to having responsible behavior toward their children and the mothers of their children. Men have in many cases been only the physical, genetic requirement.
This diminishment of the man’s role and importance in children’s lives has been a result of the style in which feminist policies have been inculcated and disseminated and it has had a devastating effect on children.
Focusing on the importance of being free sexually has unexpectedly resulted in an over sexualization of children – on one hand creating children as sexual beings far earlier than is healthy while keeping them as children with respect to when they need to be responsible. The Disney corporation, now a part of ABC, focuses on portraying young children as far superior in intelligence than their parents, while dramatizing even the animation characters as over-sexualized with large breasts barely fitting into the drawn-on dress that minimally covers the child’s hips. Additionally, presenting strength in these female characters as aggressive while diminishing any reference to femininity, interior strength required to withstand labor and required to be mindful and powerful creators. While on the one hand it is refreshing to see the removal of all the victim/rescuer stories of past days it is problematic that the message moves from victim awaiting rescue to sexualized aggressive (read masculinized) child.
To project women as strong beings at ease with their sensuality, recognizing the power in their fullness would be far more effective in strengthening women’s rights and opportunities. Women need to be able to embrace their sexuality and carry power over their bodies without having to choose to be either a shielded/covered up being or someone who is throwing sex into every equation… it is a matter of elevating the conversation, presenting power through an emancipated woman able to choose how she wants to be seen and represented in the world.
Women’s rights have actually been diminished in this new sexual age, due to the masculinization of femininity through this skewed feminism…see the youtube below for an example.
The culture has disconnected the rights, and responsibilities for/to those rights, so that the adolescence period has gone from five years (13-18) to 13 years (13-26). Rather than offering an opportunity to further develop skills by offering a longer adolescent period, this has resulted in a situation where they are ill-prepared to enter society as high functioning participants. They have become accustomed to having no responsibilities tied to their rights.
Adolescence is a social, cultural construct. It is not a biological stage. In human societies the adolescent remains with the family to learn social roles, expectations, and develop moral concepts, cognitive skills, impulse control, and develop skills/work training.
From a neurological perspective the brain continues to develop and is somewhat plastic through 26 (28). From a psychosocial perspective the development through the Erikson stages is fairly plastic through age 24. So with those two pieces of data – by not tying rights and responsibilities together before 26 – we are essentially sealing the cognitive beliefs and behaviors to have these unlinked from each other, thereby creating a distorted sense of dependence and independence.
The cost of feminism on this Course, delineated in Part 1, and Part 2, is to diminish the importance of teaching, modeling, caring for children and helping them become independent in the proper timeline. It has distorted the importance of gender roles within the context of a family and a social group. Thereby leaving both women and men unsure as to how to relate to one another. (See Turning Me to WE: The Art of Partnering with Mindfulness, Gineris, 2013).
The human species has one of the longest childrearing times. This is partially due to the fact that the human brain is underdeveloped at birth. The style in which humans learn about how to live, grow, partner, and socialize is through modeling from the significant caregivers. Without a representation of healthy interrelating, whole, balanced yin and yang aspects of each gender in the social structure, how can a little human learn to be a multi-dimensionally developed adult? I wonder to what degree this is the reason for such a high level of depression, bipolarity, ADHD, and suicidal thinking among our children — they aren’t given am opportunity to create a true connection to meaning, manage their internal needs with their social expectations, manage their will, understand and develop resilience and personal strength.
You don’t really see suicide in healthy animal populations, until and unless there is human contamination with that species – so it’s something to consider how society may be creating such problems through an imbalanced perspective of femininity.
With respect to humans, across societies women predominantly care for children; in some societies they do physical work as well as household work, depending on the need in that region and the level of financial need.
So, diminishing the importance of that feminine role, and handing it off to state agencies: day care, schools, and programs limits and truncates the positive aspects of a women’s skills in this regard.
Studies show that the brains of women actually are wired to tend and befriendin times of strife…yet feminists are trying to eradicate that aspect of a woman’s role –trying to create yang brains instead of yin ones…
(See figure to the left) Women experience tend and befriend response rather than Fight and flight, moderated through oxytocin and other hormones. Secreted at times of bonding, nurturing, breast-feeding and relationships. Taylor SE et al. Psych Review 2000;107(3):411-29
Those who want to control a society go to the child generation to actually program in what is seen as valuable, acceptable, and imprint the belief systems required for the society. This has to be enacted before the development of moral thinking which begins to solidify around 9 years old…although there is evidence that moral thinking begins earlier than that, and that concentrated, practiced mindful meditation can strongly influence the development of altruism and empathy.
Hatred of a specific group has to be taught to a child. Self-confidence, management of will and power, are all taught. Through efficient parenting children develop from dependent, to independent, to interdependent; without it a child or adolescent can become stuck in an earlier stage of development and simply not reach his or her full potential as an adult in interactive and cognitive skills.
Due to the plasticity of the brain through 24-26 (or 28) year old, enculturation is clarified in the young adult years, making schools, and learning institutions opportunities for mind expanding or mind-contracting growth. Depending on what is happening in those learning institutions. If feminists say that to be a healthy woman you must have specific political beliefs and specific roles than feminism is diminishing the rights and opportunities of women.
Here is an example of how the feminist movement has lost site of its vision.
I have been observing a sharp shift in focus in the universities’ presentation of fact versus beliefs in fields that are represented by women’s studies, philosophy, and sociology. What I am observing is that universities have increasingly become factories to promote propaganda of various ideologies by either stating things are truth, that are simply belief systems, or setting up ‘studies’ to promote these ‘truths’. Additionally the activities of critical thinking, and interactive investigation through dialogue are less supported and in fact discouraged.
There is a movie out called God’s not Dead (April 2014) which documents the inner attack of religion and the attack of specifically christian-faith groups on college and university campuses across America…resulting in over twenty legal civil rights court cases wherein the religious groups and students personal rights were harmed… this underscores my observation that specific prevailing beliefs are being offered as truth in the universities across america...resulting in the universities being propaganda promoters rather than communities of higher learning and free discourse. Although the movie is a dramatization of these events, the style in which those of faith are attacked in general under the guise of intellectuality is ubiquitous.
This course of feminism, the masculinization of femininity, has resulted in a breakdown in the importance of teaching children, and caring for them. This role has thus been taken away from the home and has begun to be placed in government agencies, day care systems, and schools. We don’t efficiently care for them as a society, we are expecting dependence, and we don’t provide the environment that allows for independence and the evolution of consciousness.
To create a new more comprehensive feminist movement yin aspects of femininity need to be honored.
All women’s choices for healthy roles in the society need to be valued.
Attack of women to reduce their power or control them needs to be disavowed.
Transcending the spaces where yin and yang interact to incorporate both in an equal way would result in setting right the current imbalance, offering a true path toward valuing the feminine.
This would result in an elevation of consciousness and the incorporation into leadership, and society, the qualities of compassion, collaboration and unity, all feminine, yin aspects of personality. Many of the answers to the current global dilemmas can be found through a rebalancing of these feminine, yin qualities into feminism. The power of the feminine is best when it is balanced yin and yang, and that which is at the core feminine in nature provides grace, strength, and power to the solutions therein.
Each reader can create change now, by simply resetting his or her internal balance of yin and yang. When you transcend the duality of aggression or victim, you elevate consciousness to include balanced yin and yang. Balanced interaction begets more balance, the shift up is natural and moves instantaneously, it is quantum in nature. Your energy can effect change . Be the change you wish to see in the world. Namaste, in love and light, bg
Discover where you are in the Temperament and the MAAPS section. You can see how you see the world, and whether you have an attachment that is creating problems in your relationships. MAAPS will help you to discern your insecurities and understand how and what underlies how you developed your insecurity driver (Money, Achievement, Attachment, Power, Structure).
If you want to change your life, see how you can bring mindfulness to your parenting and relationships. One being at a time you can elevate the way in which you treat one another and elevate the consciousness on the planet so that equality, balance, and freedom BEcome the norm for all. in love and light, bg
I perceive men and women to be two aspects to a whole; that masculine and feminine (yang and yin) energy create a wholeness within each being, and together for partnering. As with many species the masculine and feminine aspects of the whole are different due to what roles each take within the milieu of the species, and this also varies for each human. So that men and women, each, are comprised of masculine and feminine aspects, for Jung that is like anima and animus within each man and woman, or from the Taoist and Confucian traditions yang and yin.
Feminism would have been better to focus on the concept of equity. So that if a woman was built such that she could carry a gun and fight in a war she could/would have the opportunity to do so..and be paid equally, and if a woman chose to care for her children enter and leave the workforce, her choices, would be supported and honored by the feminist movement.
Women (and Men) supporting all women’s choices increasing the opportunities that were available to women would have been a more fruitful role of the feminist movement.
Instead the leaders and proponents of feminism created a hierarchy of what was acceptable and honored by feminists. What feminism did was demoralize and put down women who chose to do work that the feminist movement was working against, while uplifting the kind of work that was seen as important (an example of this was the attacks on mrs Romney and mrs bush in the media, and by feminists in general, or at least the complete ignoring of how these women were demoralized by the media– ie: treating mrs Romney like she had no value in her opinion because she had ‘never worked’ because ‘all she did was run the household, and raise four or five children on her own, while her husband was working outside the home’).
This lack of outrage, when women who were choosing to take roles that were not supported by feminist theory were attacked, is a form of control. It is a yang style of controlling the message of what being a strong woman is as well as educating the younger generation of women to direct them into specific action, or be left alone without the support of the group (feminists).
This style of control is yang in nature. And the activities supported by the feminist movement values Yang energy and yang roles (aggressive, and pushing up and out energy) over Yin energy and yin roles (caregiving, creative from within, concretizing and supporting energy). Yang is masculine. Yin is feminine. For balance both are required. Focus on one over another results in imbalance.
This is the masculinization of femininity through feminism -> feminists putting down traditional roles and defining what roles were valuable… Focussing on developing yang aspects of femininity over the yin aspects — therefore making yang more valuable than yin. This has negatively affected the whole balance of the species and society.
I see this most starkly with reference to parenting and to a lesser extent on the arguments for abortion at any time for any reason.
The issue of parenting, childrearing and leading through caregiving and passage of culture to children through childrearing is a most powerful and positive role that had been generally embraced by women. Today’s feminists, and the feminists of the nineties through the millennium, have so aligned with the power potential through the yang aspects of power that they have essentially discarded this role. Some say this is in the effort to get women to be taken seriously in the workforce; others more privately report they remember their mothers were not taken seriously or did not have the freedom and power of their gender counterparts and so these women have simply dissected that role from their repertoire of roles.
If, the Feminist focus was on equally representing the value of parenting, running the home- which is like a CEO of a company- even the vast work involved in the running of the many charities that women who are not working outside the home participate in and develop, then it would have increased the value in childbearing, and the recognition that childrearing imparts the beliefs and values of society —
This is the reason that in countries where women are truly repressed, through control of their bodies, highly limited freedom, and the lack of education, the women are unable to effect a positive role in the upbringing of the children and so unable to create a shift away from the demoralization of women in those countries. In America where women have much more freedom, access to education, and greater choice in how they choose to partner, work and live…and thus the ability to create change as part of a group, (which feminism could have offered to women), we have diminished the importance of education, childrearing, charity work, community work and many yin aspects of negotiation, collaboration, compassion, and finding ways to not compete but to strengthen through collaborative work – valuing all parts of the whole not just the winner/ yang aspect.
Feminism has let whole generations down in the out of control focus on yang energy and the masculinization of the feminine.
The focus on individuality- increasing a women’s ‘power’ to have the same ‘rights’ as a man to be free to do whatever she wants, has left no one to help to create the fabric of community which is often the feminine yin role. And it has most negatively affected yin capacities in the social network… Education childrearing, compassion, collaboration.
Competition, power-over in a hierarchical fashion– ever moving upward – all yang aspects are the stronger focus– and many of the civil rights issues of today (not of the sixties for black Americans) are about being accomplished primarily through the very actions that the victimized group is saying shouldn’t be done… This is not transcending the problem to actually uplevel. That was the beauty of Martin Luther King and Mahatma Gandhi, they transcended the anger and the hatred to connect at the human level. They did not attack the perpetrators, but really acted in the way they were requesting of others to act toward their cause.
This is what feminism could do but not what feminism has done. That’s why I call feminism the masculinization of femininity.
Here is an example of feminism in action, young women ostracizing, dismissing, and labeling – saying on one hand that everyone is welcome, and that tolerance of all was paramount, but their specific actions were to be exclusive and not even allow a young woman to speak, based on a label.
Transcending the problem incorporating yin and yang elements to balance would have resulted in an elevation of consciousness wherein women are not discriminated against nor are children or men. To see how children are being harmed by this course of focus by the feminist movement read part 3 of this series. in love and light, bg