Take the time today and over the next seven days to envision a picture of health. This is the foundation of what you desire to create. Include in this picture a multidimensional perspective of your self.
What a re you looking for?
Better, more healing relationships?
A healthier relationship to food, your body, your spiritual connection?
A way to navigate your multitasking life, or overwhelming commitments?
A way to manage anxiety and stress?
An increase in vitality both mentally and physically?
Take an hour ( or two) to create the picture with words or a collage. You may use your personal creative skills of drawing or painting or picture cut out of magazines to design your visual prompt.
You can use the collage of words and pictures as a source or map from which you can draw support and reaffirm your goals.
Once you have completed this visual aid, set up a morning and evening ten minute time to reset you commitment to your goals. Sit in a quiet place and view the picture, then close your eyes and breathe… Breathing in and breathing out for three to five minutes. While you are doing this you may identify more information about what you may what to accomplish. Write this down and then return to your breathing.
Over the course of the next seven days you may add this information to your visual aid.
Do this for ten minutes in the morning and ten minutes in the evening.
Over the course of the next seven days, increase your awareness of what you feel is or is not working in your life – or what you desire to shift. You may add this to your map/visual aid.
In addition, you may want to practice 9 sun salutations per morning to assist you in centering and returning to breath. Here is an article with visuals to assist you in creating this practice. http://www.yogitimes.com/article/re-balance-healing-healer-life
And as always, Remember you have a better chance of getting where you want to go if you have a map…in love and light, many blessings, bg
You can find out more at http://www.bethgineris.com. Beth’s upcoming book, 6 steps to transcending conflict and elevating consciousness, due out in 2015 offers special techniques for releasing unresolved injuries…and the elevation of consciousness.
You may participate in seminars to learn these techniques through the bethgineris website. Beth’s groundbreaking book Turning Me to WE: The Art of Partnering with Mindfulness(2013), has some great tools about Temperament style and your personal style of partnering, as well as the insecurity Drivers MAAPS. Discover where you are in the Temperament and the MAAPS section. You can see how you see the world, and whether you have an attachment that is creating problems in your relationships. MAAPS will help you to discern your insecurities and understand how and what underlies how you developed your insecurity driver (Money, Achievement, Attachment, Power, Structure).
You can find ways to simply connect to yourself in a loving forgiving way through theTurning No to ON: The Art of Parenting with Mindfulness Book (2011).If you want to change your life, see how you can bring mindfulness to your parenting and relationships.
One being at a time you can elevate the way in which you treat one another and elevate the consciousness on the planet so that equality, balance, and freedom BEcome the norm for all. in love and light, bg
“the conflict between the anti-american attitude of the far left of the sixties and the beliefs of the first generation immigrants who choose America and the belief in the opportunity to chart my own course….” Dinesh D’souza
The issues are complex. The dialogue is so seductive. It belies the complexity of the issues.
This is a photo lauded on facebook recently – I know they want to make a difference and change what they perceive as negative in government and the powers that be…
However, passing this photo off as truth is actually how propaganda works.
It pulls the reader who accepts it whole, into acting toward other people, a group of people who don’t precisely agree with them, in the exact ways they condemn…
This is a crisis in our global community right now…this linear, third dimensional thinking wrapped up in the rhetoric of consciousness, social activism, and the rhetoric of the sixties. The seductive quality of the rhetoric uses all the tricks that belie logic, straw man arguments, non-sequiturs…
The comments written within the photo don’t hold up to critical thinking. In order to address the problems facing the global community integrated mindful investigation of the problems facing us is necessary. We need to uplevel our consciousness, include opposing views, paradigm shift, and integrate to solve these problems.
Arguing for the opposite of what iskeeps us on the same linear third dimensional curve.
This is the problem with positive rights. This is the reason for a constitution of negative rights. Negative rights protect they press the reader to use critical thinking, to stand in the center of his/her integrated self and create from an internal locus of control the world that supports all beings. Positive rights simply change the name and status of victim or persecutor.
How could you not believe in equal rights for gays, to love whom they love freely and without harassment? It is good to allow freedom. It is not good to force it by persecuting another group or person.
How could you not believe in a woman’s right to make decisions about her own body? Yes women should be free to choose how to maintain their bodies and care for their physical vehicles…they should not be forced to have sexual relationships or to not have them. The issue of pregnancy is complicated because the women and child share the same physical vehicle for that brief 10 month period. Pretending that the being growing inside a woman is something other than another human being belies the reality and diminishes intelligence. Anyone who has been pregnant knows the child is real at the start, a growing human being.
The same people who fight for abortion also fight for protecting animal infants…so how is this? Because of the trick of linguistics…the human growing inside the woman is renamed fetus — as if this being has no connection to the baby that might later be born. The answer is to support protect and care for the women, human babies AND animals, and animal babies AND the environment…it isn’t an either/or. The seductive propaganda has more caring for animal and plant life than human…Intelligence dictates that all life be valued. Just as animals should not be raised for consumption as if they have no sentience, humans babies growing inside a woman’s body should not be treated as if they have no sentience.
How could you not agree with the issues of protecting the earth, recycling, allowing people to set up a household in our country that are seeking asylum? Yep, yep, yep, all important things, and all should be dealt with at the same level of honor.
So valuable…where have the words of Kennedy, and Martin Luther King gone…what has happened to them, twisting them around to support violence and harm against others to take from the government rather than to serve one’s country…twisted it into fighting for imprisonment but using their words —
The thing that we have is our capacity to connect through mindfulness. It is telling that the group who once used to ‘question authority’ have become the group controlling what and how someone thinks. This shows the lack of balance and the degree of incongruence.
From my perspective, this shift in focusin the liberal agenda and propaganda, proves Freud’s theory, that if you don’t work through your issues you will become the person(s) you hate, and you won’t be able to see it in yourself…We have to elevate consciousness not stifle it.
From a consciousness perspective we are developing as two worlds. One world is arguing points from a 3rd dimensional plane — pushing for rights, but forgetting about responsibilities..these individuals for the most part have their hearts soundly in the right place — they want to change what isn’t working or what seems to be avarice, consumerism, and divisiveness…yet they are not using their critical thinking to think outside the crowd mentality, outside the mob mentality of right/might over wrong. This has some of the language of the evolving interconnected elevated consciousness but none of the energy. The mobs killing to make others listen, no matter how important you think your message is – you destroy your credibility through your behavior.
The other consciousness that is evolving is that of one global world, completely interconnected– all human cultures with animals, plants, and the earth…this consciousness is not on the path of 3rd dimension good/bad, right/wrong, but rather on the path of discernment, wholeness, and collaboration. It is in the tessellation space where we are in agreement and built on that. It is compassionate, loving, and embracing collaboration.
It is on another plane from the right /wrong, 3rd dimensional space.
The challenge to everyone of us is to respond to our environment with compassion. Thinking you are right, and acting from this righteous place creates defensiveness in the other person. Finding your inner knowing and making honest efforts to connect that inner knowing with another’s inner knowing that creates love, care, connection, and peace.
The elevation of consciousness begins within you, within me, within our children. And we cannot create the space for that when we treat others without compassion; when we treat others as if we are superior in our ideology. Compassion open the door for understanding and negotiation and finally a place where agreement is.
….the way home is through..first within yourself — addressing the complicated incongruent beliefs and behaviors you have and finding a level of congruence in your thinking and actions. Then next within your family systems. Then within your friendships and work. And finally in how you choose your government and what policies you encourage.
It is a shift away from the power of alpha and popularity mentality toward REAL integrity, and value – from this space you can act in a way that is congruent with this elevation of consciousness.
It’s tricky to stand in the center of your beliefswith your actions and be ready to be disapproved of, dropped off your social network groups because you are not in agreement with the group… and STILL remain loving, compassionate and strive for connection…that IS the elevation of consciousness, to move the group acceptance and drive for power into the workhorse role rather than the leadership role and have your Heart, true internal sensory guidance, and spiritual knowing be your leading guide.
In this season of light let it be so…allow your light to shine and be a being of love and light. The continuation of the planet depends on your capacity to heal yourself, heal your relationships, and live consciously from this space. Shalom, Namaste, Blessings, in love and light, bg
And as always, Remember you have a better chance of getting where you want to go if you have a map…in love and light, many blessings, bg
You can find out more at http://www.bethgineris.com. Beth’s upcoming book, 6 steps to transcending conflict and elevating consciousness, due out in 2015 offers special techniques for releasing unresolved injuries…and the elevation of consciousness.
You may participate in seminars to learn these techniques through the bethgineris website. Beth’s groundbreaking book Turning Me to WE: The Art of Partnering with Mindfulness(2013), has some great tools about Temperament style and your personal style of partnering, as well as the insecurity Drivers MAAPS. Discover where you are in the Temperament and the MAAPS section. You can see how you see the world, and whether you have an attachment that is creating problems in your relationships. MAAPS will help you to discern your insecurities and understand how and what underlies how you developed your insecurity driver (Money, Achievement, Attachment, Power, Structure).
You can find ways to simply connect to yourself in a loving forgiving way through theTurning No to ON: The Art of Parenting with Mindfulness Book (2011).If you want to change your life, see how you can bring mindfulness to your parenting and relationships.
One being at a time you can elevate the way in which you treat one another and elevate the consciousness on the planet so that equality, balance, and freedom BEcome the norm for all. in love and light, bg
Whether you will be embracing the holiday with friends and family or alone, Here are some tips to help:
Think SMILE: Spirit, Mind, Intention, aLignment, and Energy
Holidays can be stressful on your spirit, mind, body and community connections.
A little stress is fine, you can think of how it helps you stretch yourself and push the boundaries of your life and living habits. But too much stress is harmful, it can lead to inflammation, anxiety, wear and tear on your spirit, attitude, and physical self.
Humans experience stress by hunkering down, pulling in, holding in tense muscles and releasing cortisol. This is all good if you are faced with a situation that requires immediate reactive attention and action. But it’s important to then move through that event to recovery and reset…homeostasis, return to balance.
This is a normal aspect of how your integrated physical/emotional/spiritual body works….sympathetic nervous system is the action system in your integrated self and the parasympathetic nervous system is the regenerative system of you integrated self.
Holidays give the promise of regeneration, connection, and gratitude…but often the reality is STRESS…feeling disconnected, running around to make things work, and/or intense feeling of loss or lack for those are not in the situation to be with community. The last part of this has to do with the basic human empathic drive to connect. This drive to connect is not just emotional it is hard-wired into your brain through mirror neurons. Mindful meditation assists in increasing empathy and altruism as part of how your brain works. Of course having a willingness to simply breathe, meditate and refocus is a great way to deal with stress. But for any of you who need some tricks to get yourself there, here are some great ideas.
SMILE is a way to help yourself. Not only is the action of smiling releasing of positive chemicals in your brain it also has a relaxing effect on your muscles. Next, after you smile remember to breathe deeply into your solar plexus…this also causes a deep sense of relaxation and triggers the positive effects of the parasympathetic nervous system.
Have on hand the following helpful Brain foods, spices, smells, and tastes….
Brain foods...Walnuts, pecans, eggs, kidney beans, white beans, ( these food have positive effects on your brain neurotransmitters and strengthen the plasticity of your brain – that’s what helps with memory and learning) ( also these foods have important amino proteins that help strengthen the cortex of your brain) Cacao (that’s right dark chocolate treats anxiety by calming our heart), coffee ( the coffee bean has positive antioxidant and health benefits for brain and heart activity – careful on the amount, stay at 2 cups a day), cauliflower, broccoli, and dark colored berries (blueberries, cherries, raspberries) as well as the amazing energizing, immune strengthening food, goji berries… and wonderful avocado, the best kind of fat necessary to really keep your blood vessels going and your brain working.
Spices…Cinnamon (calms your spirit while energizing your body…balances blood sugar, eases digestion), Licorice (licorice bark, fennel, anise) licorice calms your heart – actually slows your heart pulse, and eases digestion for those upcoming heavy meals, Clove, ( energizes and balances – it has a synergistic effect on your spirit mind and body – which results in a sense of peace, and use these Smells to further positively effect your integrated energetic system.
Tastes..Citrus has an immediate effect on mood..Lemon, and Lime help to diffuse anger; Orange and Bergamot are anti-depressant; peppermint opens the nasal passages and the lungs, oregano helps to balance the internal digestive system. Clove, frankincense , vanilla, lavender, all, reset and balance deeper levels of dissonance, sadness, grief and loneliness, anxiety and heart injury. These work best both from a taste and scent perspective.
So using these foods as medicine helps you to set the stage for the returning to balance and get your parasympathetic nervous system to engage and shift your energy.
SMILE is a perfect acronym for this – the action reminds you to focus on the attitude of gratitude.
Try these these three things:
Pay attention to what is working in your life, rather than what isn’t working…Rather than continuing to pile-on exterior examples of how the world is against you – consider the things that are working in your life…this action helps you focus on the WHOLE of your life and so diminishes the negative effect of your life stressors and increases the positive effect of your life’s benefits.
Focus on what you want rather than what you fear..this is a way to reset where your power is- attend to what you have control over and put your energy into that rather than worrying about the events or possibilities that might happen or that you have no control over changing…this is a locus of control concept and resets your locus (place) of control into your internal center. The result is empowered action and inner strength.
Change have to Be… If you want to have something in your relationship, be that. This is the power of modeling and increasing your internal empowerment and focus on what is working…Gandhi’s: BE the change you wish to see in the world.
The idea of shifting your perspective to gratitude, is the intention behind the idea of Thanksgiving, when this intention is lost in the activity of making it perfect or feeling like you have nothing to be thankful for, Smile can assist you to shift your perspective.
Smile: Spirit, Mind, Intention, aLignment, and Energy
Spirit: reconnect to your heart’s joy through these foods, spices, smells, and tastes..
Mind: Shift your attitude to where you actually have power, engage compassion, forgiveness, and perspective shifting.
Intention: reset to your parasympathetic nervous system, slow down and rest what you really want to accomplish- what your goal is for the holiday — the attitude of gratitude.
aLignment: reorder your priority to what you want not what you fear – to what is working – what you are grateful for – to where you have power… Ie: if you burn the turkey – you are still all together – so maybe you are having a vegetarian thanksgiving…the old make lemonade out of lemons rather than stressing about approval and perfection.
Energy: get out and move, make sure you sleep, release and let go of historical grudges – forgive, (if the action is something that disallows you from seeing the person – this is a reasonable choice -> it is the holding on that I am suggesting you release – it happened, it changed you or the other person or your relationship – accept that fact, and then release the anger, fear, and negativity so that it can be placed into your history and not create stress or disease in the now).
Smile. It is a gift to yourself and a gift to those with whom you interact. It is a flower that can uplevel your and other’s consciousness. Smile gratitude, forgiveness, rejuvenate, return to balance. These are good preps to having a Happy Thanksgiving and a positive experience in the coming holidays. in love and light, bg
You can find out more at http://www.bethgineris.com. Beth’s upcoming book, 6 steps to transcending conflict and elevating consciousness, due out in 2015 offers special techniques for releasing unresolved injuries…and the elevation of consciousness.
You may participate in seminars to learn these techniques through the bethgineris.com. Beth’s groundbreaking book Turning Me to WE: The Art of Partnering with Mindfulness(2013), has some great tools about Temperament style and your personal style of partnering, as well as the insecurity Drivers MAAPS. Discover how your worldview works to your benefit or detriment, and whether you have an attachment that is creating problems in your relationships. MAAPS will help you to discern your insecurities and understand how and what underlies how you developed your insecurity driver (Money, Achievement, Attachment, Power, Structure).
You can find ways to simply connect to yourself in a loving forgiving way through theTurning No to ON: The Art of Parenting with Mindfulness Book (2011). If you want to change your life, see how you can bring mindfulness to your parenting and relationships.
One being at a time you can elevate the way in which you treat one another and elevate the consciousness on the planet so that equality, balance, and freedom BEcome the norm for all. in love and light, bg
As you develop through your life you emphasize and de-emphasize different aspects of who you ARE – your multi-layer-self.
Your multi-layer-self is comprised of your spiritual, emotional/cognitive, physical self.
This is especially true as you move through the decades of your life and it follows a specific course. You get the opportunity to actually grow a new skin, and develop into a fuller more balanced personality or self every ten years or so…
Each decade offers you a new perspective and it gives you a chance to incorporate what you have learned in the past in a whole new way…I think of this as discarding your outgrown old skin and growing a new skin.
In the earliest aspect of your life 0-10 years you are developing the foundation of how you see yourself:what matters to you and how you want to be connected to those around you.
This is the beginning of your lifelong relationship with how you get what you want and how you make a place for yourself with others… this requires balance.
At first your neediness may be the focus and boundaries are set from an outside source. As you move through this decade you develop internalized boundaries that assist you in managing your needs and the expectations or wants of your group.
If you had injuries, abandonment, deficiencies in how your early environment responded to your needs then you will develop an over-developed dependence on yourself (so rigid boundaries) <the I-style of relationship in MAAPS*> or an over-dependence on others (so enmeshed boundaries) <the me-style of relationship in MAAPS*> .
When this occurs your development in the decades that follow will have a skew toward rigidity, difficulty connecting at a deep level or enmeshment (what some call co-dependence) which also results in a difficulty to connect at a deep level in relationship.
These difficulties look different in relationship but skew out from the same place…inner insecurity and imbalance.
If you had a balanced set of love and discipline in the first ten years of life you will have a basic flexibility in how you manage getting what you want and pleasing those whom you call family and friends.
This grows in depth and breadth throughout the next decades and you will find yourself having the internal strength to focus your life toward goals while simultaneously creating loving relationships.
The decade of 10 – 20 years offers a new level of managing your internal focus and boundaries. This is biologically a time when relationship outside your family of origin begins to have greater importance. You determine what aspects of your familial groups and group constructs are in alignment with your goals and perspectives of the world and yourself.
This is where you benefit from an early life that included a sense of freedom and boundaries in balance. When you have this in balance you are flexible in how you negotiate care of yourself and care of others. Additionally, you have a more grounded sense of your assets and limitations which supports you creating goals that are within your reach and goals that promote a sense of positivity and empowerment within you and your community.
If you have somehow skewed off into a me-style or I-style of relationship, then you have to develop inner security, empathy and boundaries. This is the work of the decades 20-30 and for those of you who are from the 90s and 2000 generation this may incorporate the decade of 30-40.
Here a sense of spirit is good to discuss.
A loss of faith has hit a lot of the millennium generation…loss of faith in elders, in the world at large, even in the purpose of living on the planet. This has resulted in a sense of being out of balance with the world around them.
In order to reconnect with yourself, in relationship or/and with your community you must reconnect with your sense of spirit.
Try to avoid the trap of hearing religion or god-practice for right now…
Think about the concept of Lovingkindness, embrace the true reality that we are all connected — all human communities, all life beings on the planet…even the planet itself to each of us…and the planets in our universe to our planet and us…
You can find this in reconnecting to your internal sensory guidance system..your 5 + 1 senses …your senses of seeing, tasting, feeling, smelling, hearing and intuition..these are your perfect guides to what path to take. These are your proof in this interconnectedness and your sense of spirit.
Once you allow your sensory guidance system to chart your course then your relationships become mutually empowering and your faith returns. By listening and responding to your 5 + 1 senses you create goals that fill you with strength, resilience and joy. You will naturally use empathy, inner security, and boundaries to map your life.
Here you will be emphasizing both your internal needs and goals and your external group requirements with a sense of unification and faith. in love and light, bg
Remember you have a better chance of getting where you want to go if you have a map…in love and light, many blessings, bg
You can find out more at http://www.bethgineris.com. Beth’s upcoming book, 6 steps to transcending conflict and elevating consciousness, due out in 2014 offers special techniques for releasing unresolved injuries..
You may participate in seminars to learn these techniques through the bethgineris website. Beth’s groundbreaking book Turning Me to WE: The Art of Partnering with Mindfulness(2013), has some great tools about Temperament style and your personal style of partnering, as well as the insecurity Drivers MAAPS. Discover where you are in the Temperament and the MAAPS section. You can see how you see the world, and whether you have an attachment that is creating problems in your relationships. MAAPS will help you to discern your insecurities and understand how and what underlies how you developed your insecurity driver (Money, Achievement, Attachment, Power, Structure).
You can find ways to simply connect to yourself in a loving forgiving way through theTurning No to ON: The Art of Parenting with Mindfulness Book (2011).If you want to change your life, see how you can bring mindfulness to your parenting and relationships.
One being at a time you can elevate the way in which you treat one another and elevate the consciousness on the planet so that equality, balance, and freedom BEcome the norm for all. in love and light, bg
The most challenging aspect of relationship is connecting…not when you feel all gooey and lovey, but when you feel hurt, disconnected, or angry…of course that is one of the most important times to connect..
Try these two steps when you are faced with that situation..
Do a cognitive head stand:
Think of everything you like about that person, whether you feel angry because of something they did or didn’t do or say OR hurt by them in some way,
This focuses you on why you want to work out the disconnect and how much you care about him or her… once you do that, you free yourself up from the defensive, fight posture and open yourself up to the connection posture…
Hold an image of the person in your mind in that loving space when you begin to discuss the problem…every time you feel his or her negativity, reorient yourself internally – look at that image,
That will help you communicate from your heart, you will have to say what is bugging you, but HOW you say it will be what is communicated – the love and connection.
Do these two things and you have a far better chance for success.
It’s not about being right it’s about be with (connecting)…that’s the glue of relationship.
Relationships are dynamic and multi-level. You come in and out of being in the same space. Sometimes you are completely in sync and when that happens you flow. When you feel the stickiness, the flow not flowing, but sticking, then you have to check your perspective and reorient yourself.
It helps to remember what brought you to the relationship in the first place.
This requires you shift out of a right/wrong, defensive perspective and into a clarity of connection. It requires you disperse and shift defensiveness in to connection.
Defensiveness is a product of feeling attacked. In most relationships defensiveness is the way in which the fight continues…so if you feel defensive, you can shift out of it through the above two step process. Defensiveness and competition go hand in hand.
Competition is a wonderful thing. It is a great way to discern who is the best athlete or competitor of the people who showed up to the event…but in relationship competition can be divisive, and create distance, and resentment. In relationship individuals are looking to be seen, accepted, and co-create. There can be a sharing of leadership, and knowledge and teaching.
Collaboration offers the best style of interaction in relationship. You cannot collaborate when you are vying for proof of rightness. Collaboration is a byproduct of mindful paradigm shifting. It allows both parties to share personal perspectives while discovering a centered place where both perspectives meet.
Family and love relationships are the kind of relationships where this is most paramount.
Often it is a phrase, feeling, or style of interacting that creates the defensiveness.
Left over resentments, and injuries must be resolved. Partners and family members must let go, forgive, reset, if they are going to continue in the relationship. This is the only way to disperse the defensiveness. If an injury or resentment is too big to release then you may have come to the end of the line with that relationship. Release it with love and forgiveness. Discern what is your part and make a lesson of the loss to assist you in future relationships. Don’t hold on. Let go.
When you are bound to the injury and resentment and also unwilling to let go of the relationship, you can create a difficult and unpleasant relationship.
Whenever you feel defensive, look to see what is underneath…is it connected to a historical relationship? Is it connected to an unresolved injury or resentment? Clarify what is underneath, unearth it and bring it to the surface. Then use the above two step process to try to resolve the problem with your partner. If it is unresolvable, allow yourself to release the unforgiveness. Forgive your partner and yourself; this may result in the dissolution of the relationship but it will create a freeing within you to honestly connect in your future relationships without holding the next person accountable for an unresolved injury. Namaste, in love and light, bg
You can find out more at http://www.bethgineris.com. Beth’s upcoming book, 6 steps to transcending conflict and elevating consciousness, due out in 2014 offers special techniques for releasing unresolved injuries..
You may participate in seminars to learn these techniques through the bethgineris website. Beth’s groundbreaking book Turning Me to WE: The Art of Partnering with Mindfulness(2013), has some great tools about Temperament style and your personal style of partnering, as well as the insecurity Drivers MAAPS. Discover where you are in the Temperament and the MAAPS section. You can see how you see the world, and whether you have an attachment that is creating problems in your relationships. MAAPS will help you to discern your insecurities and understand how and what underlies how you developed your insecurity driver (Money, Achievement, Attachment, Power, Structure).
You can find ways to simply connect to yourself in a loving forgiving way through theTurning No to ON: The Art of Parenting with Mindfulness Book (2011).If you want to change your life, see how you can bring mindfulness to your parenting and relationships.
One being at a time you can elevate the way in which you treat one another and elevate the consciousness on the planet so that equality, balance, and freedom BEcome the norm for all. in love and light, bg
Here are three easy steps to change your life in three weeks — and they only take minutes a day.
First, wake up one hour earlier…in the hour do 10 sun salutations. Leave 30 minutes earlier for your first appointment or check in time; when you get to your office or place of business– write down the three things you want to accomplish that day.
Second, build into your day three ten minute quiet spaces.
Third, change all your passwords to phrases that are positively empowering, express gratitude or encouragement. Every time you have to log into a site, open your computer or pay a bill and you write in your password…stop to breath and repeat the meaningful statement in your head with a sense of strength.
Do this for three weeks and you will have an increase in energy, money, and recognition.
I used this set of changes over the last five years and managed to write three books (almost finished with the fourth)… increase my income doing more of what I really love, healed my relationships in my family of origin and my chosen family…and most importantly increased my own self confidence, positive self perception, and clarified my daily interactions.
You can find out more at http://www.bethgineris.com. Even More outlined in Beth’s upcoming book, 6 steps to transcending conflict and elevating consciousness, due out in 2014. You may participate in seminars to learn these techniques through her website. This book is the HOW TO companion book to Turning Me to WE: The Art of Partnering with Mindfulness(2013). Discover where you are in the Temperament and the MAAPS section. You can see how you see the world, and whether you have an attachment that is creating problems in your relationships. MAAPS will help you to discern your insecurities and understand how and what underlies how you developed your insecurity driver (Money, Achievement, Attachment, Power, Structure). You can find ways to simply connect to yourself in a loving forgiving way through theTurning No to ON: The Art of Parenting with Mindfulness Book (2011).If you want to change your life, see how you can bring mindfulness to your parenting and relationships. One being at a time you can elevate the way in which you treat one another and elevate the consciousness on the planet so that equality, balance, and freedom BEcome the norm for all. in love and light, bg
Under stress people fall back to their comfort defenses...
Seems like a strange juxtaposition of terms comfort and defense…but the concept is that you have developed a set of defensive mechanisms that have protected you in life up to now.
These are a result of missed-connections in your parenting and missed-understandings and missed-communications in your social relationships…through family, friends, teachers, and supervisors…even your clergy can at times miss in their target of teaching.
The defensive position is ..the interpretation plus reaction… you developed as a result of those missed-interactions.
If you find yourself having the same fight — again, — shift your reaction by trying to understand what is stressing your partner, child, friend or colleague… then you may be able to help alleviate the stress and find a new and more secure way to connect.
Begin by aligning fully with yourself, while completely aligning with your friend, partner, child, or colleague… in that space of complete alignment you are standing in the center of both paradigms.
It requires empathy, boundaries, and inner security.
You must empathize with the other while you have compassion for yourself.
You have to understand where your responsibility for yourself begins and ends and your responsibility to the other person begins and ends.
And you have to have a sense of knowing (confidence rather than insecurity) or security.
The fall back position happens
when you lose your sense of security or trust in the relationship (or yourself),
or you confuse where you end and the other person begins (recognize the for/to responsibility issue),
or you interpret the other as attacking you, rather than having compassion and empathy.
This action (or reaction)where you fall back to comfort defenses is the way you reset in a war.
When a person is in a war he advances, when the attack is too strong the person falls back to a comfort defense, a place where he can reset and recuperate. That’s what happens with stress.
Stress challenges individuals at a core level and causes each to feel the need to fall back and recuperate…the natural or rather knee jerk reaction is to become defensive and interpret the other person as attacking.
The best way to respond rather than react is to focus on your feelings, your sensory guidance system…what are you feel in your senses…then you align with your feeling BUT not with your historical interpretation of what that feeling means. By unlinking your feeling, from your interpretation of what that feeling means about the other person, you are creating the space for empathy (compassion), boundaries (paradigm recognition and shifting), and inner security.
Catch yourself when you are in the fall back position.
Catch yourself when you have raised a shield of protection, defensiveness.
Catch yourself when you feel alone behind a rigid wall of your own creation.
Catch yourself when you feel yourself pulling back your heart from the situation.
Truth is held at the center of all paradigms. When you allow yourself to release your attachment to something being a certain way then you are free to shift your paradigm and connect. Take the time now to understand what matters to you. Look for ways to be congruent in your beliefs, your thinkings, and your actions. Allow your words and actions to align with each other.
Discern what creates defensiveness, fear, insecurity, and lack of faith in you.
You can shift away from defensiveness through these steps: Find ways to Create:
Connection out of defensiveness,
Love and Knowing out of fear,
Confidence out of insecurity,
and Faith out of lack of faith.
Do this and everything you desire will be at your heart center and your fingertips.
Use these uncomfortable feelings to teach you about yourself through Inner and Outer Reflection. You will become the strongest person in your world, empowered to create what you desire. Remember, to release energy blockages, you need
intention, I want to heal or uplevel my consciousness.
insight, I am projecting from a habit reaction pattern of reacting.
gratitude, This conflict is a gift to assist me in righting an inner misbelief or loss of faith.
and forgiveness, I forgive myself for how I disowned my needs; I forgive you for the injury caused knowingly or unknowingly.
How these steps direct you is through the focused energy of your personal sensory guidance system and your heart led healing rather than psych (mind) or cognitive/behavioral led healing alone. Spirit must be engaged and in the lead in order for a transcendence through thought-based, limiting beliefs. You can find out more at http://www.bethgineris.com.
Your heart knowing is Always communicating to you about what you need and who you are through your personal sensory guidance system of senses. Listen to your sense reactions, your instincts, your intuition.
Learn to interpret your feelings so that you can see what is your projection and what is universal… focus on intention, insight, gratitude, and forgiveness as an integrated system, informed by your sensory system (which includes intuition) and you will live in a different world. This is a quantum shift in consciousness led by your heart spirit connection. In each interaction, perception, and action the world can be created anew. Find your way home. from may 23,2014, energy blockages released.
These steps are outlined in Beth’s upcoming book, 6 steps to transcending conflict and elevating consciousness, due out in 2014. You may participate in seminars to learn these techniques through her website. This book is the HOW TO companion book to Turning Me to WE: The Art of Partnering with Mindfulness(2013).
Discover where you are in the Temperament and the MAAPS section. You can see how you see the world, and whether you have an attachment that is creating problems in your relationships. MAAPS will help you to discern your insecurities and understand how and what underlies how you developed your insecurity driver (Money, Achievement, Attachment, Power, Structure). You can find ways to simply connect to yourself in a loving forgiving way through theTurning No to ON: The Art of Parenting with Mindfulness Book (2011).If you want to change your life, see how you can bring mindfulness to your parenting and relationships. One being at a time you can elevate the way in which you treat one another and elevate the consciousness on the planet so that equality, balance, and freedom BEcome the norm for all. in love and light, bg
The negative effects of the masculinization of femininity. Part 3 of 3.
Dependent, apathetic, disconnected children. Adolescents and young adults are delaying stepping into a fully independent role in society while enjoying many rights at even younger ages.
I perceive the reticence of the millennium generation to avoid entering into responsible roles in society, delaying entering into adulthood through various avenues of remaining dependent on parents and institutions for support, healthcare and living expenses, the malaise, apathy and lack of focus by an increasing many of the youngest generation– I see all of these serious issues as part of the side effects of the course that feminism has taken.
Feminism has created an environment where men aren’t needed in caring for children. The way in which the feminist movement has focused on elevating women has resulted in minimizing, even eradicating the role of men in caring for and raising children; even issues of providing financially for children has fallen to the state, leaving men to be outcast with respect to having responsible behavior toward their children and the mothers of their children. Men have in many cases been only the physical, genetic requirement.
This diminishment of the man’s role and importance in children’s lives has been a result of the style in which feminist policies have been inculcated and disseminated and it has had a devastating effect on children.
Focusing on the importance of being free sexually has unexpectedly resulted in an over sexualization of children – on one hand creating children as sexual beings far earlier than is healthy while keeping them as children with respect to when they need to be responsible. The Disney corporation, now a part of ABC, focuses on portraying young children as far superior in intelligence than their parents, while dramatizing even the animation characters as over-sexualized with large breasts barely fitting into the drawn-on dress that minimally covers the child’s hips. Additionally, presenting strength in these female characters as aggressive while diminishing any reference to femininity, interior strength required to withstand labor and required to be mindful and powerful creators. While on the one hand it is refreshing to see the removal of all the victim/rescuer stories of past days it is problematic that the message moves from victim awaiting rescue to sexualized aggressive (read masculinized) child.
To project women as strong beings at ease with their sensuality, recognizing the power in their fullness would be far more effective in strengthening women’s rights and opportunities. Women need to be able to embrace their sexuality and carry power over their bodies without having to choose to be either a shielded/covered up being or someone who is throwing sex into every equation… it is a matter of elevating the conversation, presenting power through an emancipated woman able to choose how she wants to be seen and represented in the world.
Women’s rights have actually been diminished in this new sexual age, due to the masculinization of femininity through this skewed feminism…see the youtube below for an example.
The culture has disconnected the rights, and responsibilities for/to those rights, so that the adolescence period has gone from five years (13-18) to 13 years (13-26). Rather than offering an opportunity to further develop skills by offering a longer adolescent period, this has resulted in a situation where they are ill-prepared to enter society as high functioning participants. They have become accustomed to having no responsibilities tied to their rights.
Adolescence is a social, cultural construct. It is not a biological stage. In human societies the adolescent remains with the family to learn social roles, expectations, and develop moral concepts, cognitive skills, impulse control, and develop skills/work training.
From a neurological perspective the brain continues to develop and is somewhat plastic through 26 (28). From a psychosocial perspective the development through the Erikson stages is fairly plastic through age 24. So with those two pieces of data – by not tying rights and responsibilities together before 26 – we are essentially sealing the cognitive beliefs and behaviors to have these unlinked from each other, thereby creating a distorted sense of dependence and independence.
The cost of feminism on this Course, delineated in Part 1, and Part 2, is to diminish the importance of teaching, modeling, caring for children and helping them become independent in the proper timeline. It has distorted the importance of gender roles within the context of a family and a social group. Thereby leaving both women and men unsure as to how to relate to one another. (See Turning Me to WE: The Art of Partnering with Mindfulness, Gineris, 2013).
The human species has one of the longest childrearing times. This is partially due to the fact that the human brain is underdeveloped at birth. The style in which humans learn about how to live, grow, partner, and socialize is through modeling from the significant caregivers. Without a representation of healthy interrelating, whole, balanced yin and yang aspects of each gender in the social structure, how can a little human learn to be a multi-dimensionally developed adult? I wonder to what degree this is the reason for such a high level of depression, bipolarity, ADHD, and suicidal thinking among our children — they aren’t given am opportunity to create a true connection to meaning, manage their internal needs with their social expectations, manage their will, understand and develop resilience and personal strength.
You don’t really see suicide in healthy animal populations, until and unless there is human contamination with that species – so it’s something to consider how society may be creating such problems through an imbalanced perspective of femininity.
With respect to humans, across societies women predominantly care for children; in some societies they do physical work as well as household work, depending on the need in that region and the level of financial need.
So, diminishing the importance of that feminine role, and handing it off to state agencies: day care, schools, and programs limits and truncates the positive aspects of a women’s skills in this regard.
Studies show that the brains of women actually are wired to tend and befriendin times of strife…yet feminists are trying to eradicate that aspect of a woman’s role –trying to create yang brains instead of yin ones…
(See figure to the left) Women experience tend and befriend response rather than Fight and flight, moderated through oxytocin and other hormones. Secreted at times of bonding, nurturing, breast-feeding and relationships. Taylor SE et al. Psych Review 2000;107(3):411-29
Those who want to control a society go to the child generation to actually program in what is seen as valuable, acceptable, and imprint the belief systems required for the society. This has to be enacted before the development of moral thinking which begins to solidify around 9 years old…although there is evidence that moral thinking begins earlier than that, and that concentrated, practiced mindful meditation can strongly influence the development of altruism and empathy.
Hatred of a specific group has to be taught to a child. Self-confidence, management of will and power, are all taught. Through efficient parenting children develop from dependent, to independent, to interdependent; without it a child or adolescent can become stuck in an earlier stage of development and simply not reach his or her full potential as an adult in interactive and cognitive skills.
Due to the plasticity of the brain through 24-26 (or 28) year old, enculturation is clarified in the young adult years, making schools, and learning institutions opportunities for mind expanding or mind-contracting growth. Depending on what is happening in those learning institutions. If feminists say that to be a healthy woman you must have specific political beliefs and specific roles than feminism is diminishing the rights and opportunities of women.
Here is an example of how the feminist movement has lost site of its vision.
I have been observing a sharp shift in focus in the universities’ presentation of fact versus beliefs in fields that are represented by women’s studies, philosophy, and sociology. What I am observing is that universities have increasingly become factories to promote propaganda of various ideologies by either stating things are truth, that are simply belief systems, or setting up ‘studies’ to promote these ‘truths’. Additionally the activities of critical thinking, and interactive investigation through dialogue are less supported and in fact discouraged.
There is a movie out called God’s not Dead (April 2014) which documents the inner attack of religion and the attack of specifically christian-faith groups on college and university campuses across America…resulting in over twenty legal civil rights court cases wherein the religious groups and students personal rights were harmed… this underscores my observation that specific prevailing beliefs are being offered as truth in the universities across america...resulting in the universities being propaganda promoters rather than communities of higher learning and free discourse. Although the movie is a dramatization of these events, the style in which those of faith are attacked in general under the guise of intellectuality is ubiquitous.
This course of feminism, the masculinization of femininity, has resulted in a breakdown in the importance of teaching children, and caring for them. This role has thus been taken away from the home and has begun to be placed in government agencies, day care systems, and schools. We don’t efficiently care for them as a society, we are expecting dependence, and we don’t provide the environment that allows for independence and the evolution of consciousness.
To create a new more comprehensive feminist movement yin aspects of femininity need to be honored.
All women’s choices for healthy roles in the society need to be valued.
Attack of women to reduce their power or control them needs to be disavowed.
Transcending the spaces where yin and yang interact to incorporate both in an equal way would result in setting right the current imbalance, offering a true path toward valuing the feminine.
This would result in an elevation of consciousness and the incorporation into leadership, and society, the qualities of compassion, collaboration and unity, all feminine, yin aspects of personality. Many of the answers to the current global dilemmas can be found through a rebalancing of these feminine, yin qualities into feminism. The power of the feminine is best when it is balanced yin and yang, and that which is at the core feminine in nature provides grace, strength, and power to the solutions therein.
Each reader can create change now, by simply resetting his or her internal balance of yin and yang. When you transcend the duality of aggression or victim, you elevate consciousness to include balanced yin and yang. Balanced interaction begets more balance, the shift up is natural and moves instantaneously, it is quantum in nature. Your energy can effect change . Be the change you wish to see in the world. Namaste, in love and light, bg
Discover where you are in the Temperament and the MAAPS section. You can see how you see the world, and whether you have an attachment that is creating problems in your relationships. MAAPS will help you to discern your insecurities and understand how and what underlies how you developed your insecurity driver (Money, Achievement, Attachment, Power, Structure).
If you want to change your life, see how you can bring mindfulness to your parenting and relationships. One being at a time you can elevate the way in which you treat one another and elevate the consciousness on the planet so that equality, balance, and freedom BEcome the norm for all. in love and light, bg
I perceive men and women to be two aspects to a whole; that masculine and feminine (yang and yin) energy create a wholeness within each being, and together for partnering. As with many species the masculine and feminine aspects of the whole are different due to what roles each take within the milieu of the species, and this also varies for each human. So that men and women, each, are comprised of masculine and feminine aspects, for Jung that is like anima and animus within each man and woman, or from the Taoist and Confucian traditions yang and yin.
Feminism would have been better to focus on the concept of equity. So that if a woman was built such that she could carry a gun and fight in a war she could/would have the opportunity to do so..and be paid equally, and if a woman chose to care for her children enter and leave the workforce, her choices, would be supported and honored by the feminist movement.
Women (and Men) supporting all women’s choices increasing the opportunities that were available to women would have been a more fruitful role of the feminist movement.
Instead the leaders and proponents of feminism created a hierarchy of what was acceptable and honored by feminists. What feminism did was demoralize and put down women who chose to do work that the feminist movement was working against, while uplifting the kind of work that was seen as important (an example of this was the attacks on mrs Romney and mrs bush in the media, and by feminists in general, or at least the complete ignoring of how these women were demoralized by the media– ie: treating mrs Romney like she had no value in her opinion because she had ‘never worked’ because ‘all she did was run the household, and raise four or five children on her own, while her husband was working outside the home’).
This lack of outrage, when women who were choosing to take roles that were not supported by feminist theory were attacked, is a form of control. It is a yang style of controlling the message of what being a strong woman is as well as educating the younger generation of women to direct them into specific action, or be left alone without the support of the group (feminists).
This style of control is yang in nature. And the activities supported by the feminist movement values Yang energy and yang roles (aggressive, and pushing up and out energy) over Yin energy and yin roles (caregiving, creative from within, concretizing and supporting energy). Yang is masculine. Yin is feminine. For balance both are required. Focus on one over another results in imbalance.
This is the masculinization of femininity through feminism -> feminists putting down traditional roles and defining what roles were valuable… Focussing on developing yang aspects of femininity over the yin aspects — therefore making yang more valuable than yin. This has negatively affected the whole balance of the species and society.
I see this most starkly with reference to parenting and to a lesser extent on the arguments for abortion at any time for any reason.
The issue of parenting, childrearing and leading through caregiving and passage of culture to children through childrearing is a most powerful and positive role that had been generally embraced by women. Today’s feminists, and the feminists of the nineties through the millennium, have so aligned with the power potential through the yang aspects of power that they have essentially discarded this role. Some say this is in the effort to get women to be taken seriously in the workforce; others more privately report they remember their mothers were not taken seriously or did not have the freedom and power of their gender counterparts and so these women have simply dissected that role from their repertoire of roles.
If, the Feminist focus was on equally representing the value of parenting, running the home- which is like a CEO of a company- even the vast work involved in the running of the many charities that women who are not working outside the home participate in and develop, then it would have increased the value in childbearing, and the recognition that childrearing imparts the beliefs and values of society —
This is the reason that in countries where women are truly repressed, through control of their bodies, highly limited freedom, and the lack of education, the women are unable to effect a positive role in the upbringing of the children and so unable to create a shift away from the demoralization of women in those countries. In America where women have much more freedom, access to education, and greater choice in how they choose to partner, work and live…and thus the ability to create change as part of a group, (which feminism could have offered to women), we have diminished the importance of education, childrearing, charity work, community work and many yin aspects of negotiation, collaboration, compassion, and finding ways to not compete but to strengthen through collaborative work – valuing all parts of the whole not just the winner/ yang aspect.
Feminism has let whole generations down in the out of control focus on yang energy and the masculinization of the feminine.
The focus on individuality- increasing a women’s ‘power’ to have the same ‘rights’ as a man to be free to do whatever she wants, has left no one to help to create the fabric of community which is often the feminine yin role. And it has most negatively affected yin capacities in the social network… Education childrearing, compassion, collaboration.
Competition, power-over in a hierarchical fashion– ever moving upward – all yang aspects are the stronger focus– and many of the civil rights issues of today (not of the sixties for black Americans) are about being accomplished primarily through the very actions that the victimized group is saying shouldn’t be done… This is not transcending the problem to actually uplevel. That was the beauty of Martin Luther King and Mahatma Gandhi, they transcended the anger and the hatred to connect at the human level. They did not attack the perpetrators, but really acted in the way they were requesting of others to act toward their cause.
This is what feminism could do but not what feminism has done. That’s why I call feminism the masculinization of femininity.
Here is an example of feminism in action, young women ostracizing, dismissing, and labeling – saying on one hand that everyone is welcome, and that tolerance of all was paramount, but their specific actions were to be exclusive and not even allow a young woman to speak, based on a label.
Transcending the problem incorporating yin and yang elements to balance would have resulted in an elevation of consciousness wherein women are not discriminated against nor are children or men. To see how children are being harmed by this course of focus by the feminist movement read part 3 of this series. in love and light, bg
The feminist movement in the millennium and the masculinization of femininity. This is Part 1 in a series of 3.
In my early education I was taught to question accepted belief systems, as a way of clarifying the underlying paradigms and developing mindfulness. As the years have passed since my your, our world has changed. I notice that there is still a lot of questioning of traditional beliefs but I have noticed that alternative beliefs or beliefs identified as progressive are not as questioned among my peers. Perhaps it’s because it feels like it’s proven to my peers; additionally, there is this energy that finally these non-traditional ideas are now taking hold, so there is no need to question them…but I think it’s a good thing to evaluate what you believe from the inside out, and see if what is being created is actually a better situation or needs more fine-tuning.
I often find I am standing in the center of a controversial subject, which is to say that I see points of view from both sides; I experience my conclusion to these controversies is not fully in alignment to either side…so I find myself alone, a lot, outside of either group….
Just because something is popular, doesn’t make it right…and sometimes the thing that is right: sound and just, isn’t popular.
Belief systems are set in the center of the social milieu…what sociologists call location in time. As an example, in the fifties in America drinking alcohol and smoking cigarettes while pregnant was completely acceptable…today there are prohibitions not only legally and socially but also medically for doing such, because it has been determined that alcohol and cigarettes have deleterious effects on the developing baby in a woman’s womb.
So the idea of feminism has been applied to various social issues. My concept of feminism seems to be different from how the word is interpreted by various groups. From my perspective the idea of feminism is inclusive of elevating the opportunities and rights of women…not exchanging rights or limiting rights, or diminishing women who choose more traditional roles. Feminists should on the face of their actions support women, all women. They should actually stand up for each other and not create a divisive set of good women and bad women groups. Feminism should entail a broad set of beliefs that are inclusive of the roles women choose, should provide support to women figures that have attained a positive power role in society and should focus on increasing opportunity for women. At the least feminism should not be a way to deride women who are participating in traditional roles or who have chosen to be conservative versus liberal…this action alone is hypocritical and deflates the positive aspects of the feminist social movement.
These individuals have each overcome tremendous adversity and attained a position of influence and clarity in their specific fields. And yet, rather than being supported or defended by the feminist movement leaders, their treatment is either ignored or the feminist leaders are complicit in deriding the women. I understand this is sociological group behavior, ostracize behavior seen unacceptable by the ruling group leaders…and it is not popular today to be conservative, it is not popular today to go against the current progressive belief systems and it is not popular today to be in any way affiliated with the finance community…but the fact that the feminist movement is choosing which roles are acceptable and which roles are not is simply another way to control women and limit their choices which is the opposite of the goal of feminism. It is a real war on women, driven by women.
Feminism has unfortunately taken a bifurcated, and skewed course over its reign, since the late 1800s. I perceive that indeed some actions supported and advocated under feminist ideas are actually limiting women’s rights and opportunities, while others are increasing women’s freedom and equality in the American society.
By analyzing the course of feminism with a neutral perspective, unencumbered by the propaganda of the feminist movement, I have come to a few vastly different conclusions than the current progressive belief systems taught in university.
I perceive Feminism of the sixties as a paradigm of increasing the opportunities for women to participate in sexual relationships without the threat of having to deal with pregnancy or child-rearing. This is directly related to the development of the birth control pill. Women wanted the freedom they observed in their gender counterparts…This is one of the main driving forces behind feminism and ‘civil rights’ of women and is the issue that is behind women’s rights in areas where women’s sexuality are severely controlled by the society in which they live. This is a far more pressing issue in countries other than America… ie: where women are ritually circumcised to reduce the degree of sexual pleasure they experience in sex — this is to control women. This aspect of feminism is akin to women’s voting rights of the suffragist movement. Both of these aspects of feminism have greatly increased women’s rights as human being and their equality to their gender counterparts in society. I perceive to be of great importance.
Another important issue of feminism is to recognize the importance of equal pay for equal work, this was first in play in the forties and then returned in the eighties and nineties when women began to identify the glass ceiling in corporate America. It was at this time that the power suit came into play. It brought with it a shift away from creating more choice for women and extending opportunity to choosing which kind of behavior was favored by the feminist movement. This was the beginning of an accepted persecution of women whom they felt didn’t support this focus. This resulted in a fracturing of the feminist movement.
Pushing Yang (active, competitive, masculine energy) over Yin (feminine energy, inner creation, collaboration), the movement attacked women directly for their personal free choice of how to work, marry, and participate in society. Value was placed on ‘doing man’s work, in the corporate and political world. Working at home, caring for children, and traditional roles were devalued.
Women are in general paid less than men how much less depends a little of whether you are comparing apples to oranges. The amount less for similar work is now around 5% less – so an amazing good score for the efforts of feminists in this arena. But at what cost has this been achieved? The means of achieving it has created other unintended consequences (see more in part 2, and part 3 of this series).
Society and location in time have a lot to do with the original pay discrepancy and how things have changed today. A change started in the forties, the fifties created a lull in that change, but as part of the sixties movement this began to change. The nineties addressed this through a changing focus on gender roles. It has been shifting to a more equal compensation in the last ten years.
In the fifties, a man worked to support a family (children and a wife) and women worked to support one. This was partly due to the culture of the fifties that women worked in the home and men worked outside the home. So the employer tended to pay accordingly. As women became more highly educated and interested in working outside the home the shift in the marketplace represented that societal shift.
Several issues plagued the movement toward equal pay: specifically biological limits of childbearing (women are limited in the range for safely getting pregnant while men can conceive over twice the number of years), childrearing (although daycare and equality for men to stay at home and raise the children came into action in the nineties, for the most part this role fell to women).
So men stayed in the workforce and at that company while women left to have children, get married, and tended to leave to follow their partners. Additionally, from a sociological perspective men were mentored to move into the areas of business which were on the fast track to moving up the corporate ladder, marketing, sales while women were mentored into human service which dead ended at middle management or areas away from the ladder; this appears to have a connection to the issues of having the freedom to child bear and child rear and still be in the workplace.
Okay so fast forward to now: due to the no contest divorce effects, (IHM march 13, 2014 blog) and other factors, more women are having to support children without the help of men and so that fifties concept no longer applies.
Additionally, women no longer wait to have babies in a committed/married/partnered relationship. There a number of circumstances where women are not supported by the other parent indeed sometimes the other contributor is the federal or state government through Medicaid and other funding, including women who choose to parent via IVF as single parents.
So equal pay is a more appropriate response to the societal change and is a good place for feminism to focus on when supporting the rights of women.
When you do a statistical analysis that really takes into account these issues, time in the workforce, and job choice, the difference between genders is less than 5% for pay for similar jobs, according to new studies out this year.
In this arena feminism has done a great job to move forward the importance of equalizing the attitude toward women in the workforce and their value there.
But I propose the course of doing this by the feminist movement resulted in the masculinization of femininity which has had an unintended consequence of creating a harmful imbalance in society resulting in separating ‘good feminist women’ from ‘bad feminist women’ based on the roles they chose to play in society AND creating a serious breakdown of the psychosocial development of generations of children. To see how read part 2, and part 3 of this series. offered in love and light bg