Hello

Parenting, healing, Cranial-sacral energy work, and relationship all have this one thing in common – Being with while guiding forward.

Cranial-sacral work is a type of energy work wherein the practitioner holds the client’s head and gently moves it back and forth  to realign the natural flow of energy from the cranium to the sacrum.  Practitioners of this type of energy work state they both follow and lead the energy.

This seems contradictory in nature but if you think about it we do it every day in other arenas.  It’s a function of staying mindful, and focusing on the present moment, with individual responses to input stimuli, and making adjustments to our actions.

Think about driving on the freeway.  You have a plan and you pick a lane but you also have to go with the flow of the traffic both in terms of how you move forward and what speed you travel as well as whether you continue on your path or make an immediate decision to change the course you chose based on the blockage of flow due to an accident, or emergency vehicles.

Healers and management consultants have a similar situation.  They have a plan and goal based on the information requested/provided by their client.  Then as new information presents itself the facilitator may need to go a different route to get to the identified goal – or the goal itself may be dramatically changed based on the circumstances.

The process of psychotherapy itself is much like this – both following the flow of energy as well as directing the client to reveal and investigate different aspects of the situation through mindfulness and paradigm shifting to come to a new understanding and or style of being in the world.

Parenting is this action of Being with while guiding forward on a minute by minute basis both in meta– and micro terms – big and small issues.  Meta issues being things like how the child sees himself, moral development, and socialization.  Micro issues being things like getting dressed, going to school, doing homework, and  getting along with friends.

From this perspective parenting is the most powerful kind of energy work – responding in  a moment to moment basis with mindfulness and recognition of figure/ground issues to the realities, daily requirements, mood, and unconscious of the child.

Parents need to have a mindful approach to their children to be able to both identify the flow of the situation as well as guide the flow in a direction that is most beneficial.

Think about this from the perspective of de-escalation.  If your child is sleep deprived or feeling sick she may have a tendency to react negatively to any push to move forward toward going to an activity that is less preferred.

Paying attention to cues from your child really help to identify blocks in energy or flow.  Vocalizations like whining especially if the child tends to be easy-going is a cue that something is off and needs attention.  Also moving slowly, not at their typical fast pace is another cue that the child needs attention.  Silence is another type of cue especially with a child who tends to be active, talkative and social in nature.

Using the Stop, look, and listen technique is a great way to gather information quickly and respond quickly.  When one is mindful and knows her child she can better utilize cues from her child to identify blocks in the energy flow.

Being mindful and reading the flow of energy – your child’s mood and behavior – allows a parent to use responses that both validate the emotion/feeling while guiding the child forward toward the required activity.

If you are a manager you can utilize these techniques and concepts to better manage and supervise those individuals under your care.  You can look for complaining, delay and excuses to identify where there may be problems.  This is especially true when you are interacting with someone who overall does not have these kinds of behaviors as a general course.

Mindfulness applied in this way to one’s everyday life can increase your connection to others and sense of real power in your own environment – it increases one’s and others’ empowerment.

Being with while guiding forward is a beautiful concept of how to be interacting in an empowered and respectful way in your environment.

See you tomorrow.

Beth

Hello

Gandhi said:  Be the change you want to see in the world.  I think that living by the silver rule may help all of us to live by this statement by Gandhi.

In Christianity there is a saying Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.

In the Jewish tradition the saying is taught Do not do unto others what you would not want them to do unto you.

Wikipedia calls this the ethic of reciprocity and does not apply these as Christian and Jewish but rather calls them the golden rule (the positive form) and the silver rule (the negative form). This concept is also found in many philosophies including Egyptian and Greek.

I am more familiar with the golden rule.  However, of late, I have been thinking that the latter rule may be more efficacious.  Here is why:  If you need to do unto others all that you would like done to you that may be a long list however it seems to be more limiting and helpful as a boundary to simply not do unto others what you would not like done to you.  That is a smaller, clearer list; easier to follow and act on decisively.

If you consider all the things we want versus the things we do not want – most of us would agree on the big things we do not want and therefore should not do to others.  The list is limiting and defining of reasonable, social behavior.

I find the application of a set of negative rights as an interesting debate.  At present that is how our Constitution is written.

As an application to parenting it is a useful way to set up social structure for our children; the silver rule seems to be easier to grasp for children – they are pretty clear about what they do not want others to do to them.

Beginning in early childhood, identifying how to relate with one’s peers via this silver rule allows for the development of empathy and an internal moral structure.  It also teaches mindfulness; they have to consider the outcome of their actions and whether they would like it done to them.  It is a great tool for increasing and teaching mindfulness.

Of course for adolescents and adults it can be an internal process of evaluating our behavior based on this.   And allowing us to change aspects of our behavior which do not conform.  It requires Being mindful and acting in the present moment with a focus on the figure/ground of a situation.

By focusing on this we can better apply basic limits, and have a more empathic, socially supportive, style of being in the world.

I think this application of the silver rule helps to define how to deal with the line where individual needs and group needs meet.  This is one of the trickiest aspects of living in groups.  Where do my rights to something get overridden by the group right to something or the other’s right to something?  Helping our children negotiate this is one of our important tasks as parents.

Being mindful in the application of this rule helps to teach empathy and increases a person’s capacity to see figure/ground perspective.

See you tomorrow.

Beth

Hello

I like to think about adolescence as a second childhood.

It seems like what didn’t get resolved in the first 12 years gets a second chance in the second set of 12 years.  So 13 is about year one, and 14 is about year two and so on.  It’s a cool way of thinking about the issues of adolescence.

I will often ask kids and parents what was going on in those early years when I am working with adolescents and I find the insights are fascinating.

When dealing with adolescents remember that they act out what is going on – in fact the work of this period is to get them to talk about rather than act out their issues and psychological injuries.

They don’t have the self-control to not act on their impulses.   They feel deeply, as deeply as adults, but they have a truncated impulse control mechanism.

Of course for many parents this is the one area in which they have trouble – talking with their teenagers.

The best time to build your relationship with your children is when they are children.  How you treat them in their early lives sets up the relationship you have with them in their adolescence and adulthood.

Do not buy in to the belief that all children do not like their parents; that is not the case.  It is a way of abdicating responsibility to deal with our children and their relationship to us.  Just because it is common, doesn’t mean it is normal.

This is a perfect example of you reap what you sow.

Children are real people right at the beginning.  They have feelings, needs, desires, likes, dislikes that are all personal to them.  It is important to get to know your children and treat them like they are real in this way.

That doesn’t mean don’t discipline them – DO.  Do it in a way that is mindful and allows for development of a deep and secure relationship.  That is the foundation for creating trust AND strength.

Trust, strength, self-confidence and a sense of self are what children need to steady themselves through the storm of adolescence – it’s the closest thing to impulse control for an adolescent – to know himself and feel strong even in the face of adversity.  Feeling connected to a parent may be the only thing that helps an adolescent though their existential angst.

That kind of closeness is created, and built, in childhood – early childhood.

Although you can build on it later it gets more difficult to create that foundation as they get older.  There’s a lot you can heal in the first years of adolescence if you are willing to put in the effort to really connect, be present, and be congruent with your child.

Focus on creating an atmosphere where your child’s feelings, and experiences are validated.

Set limits and explain why – not as an avenue to change your mind, rather as an avenue to encourage your child to change theirs and to give them a way to align with what you are setting as structure.  This teaches them that you have a plan, a course, a reason for what may feel arbitrary.  It can create a confidence in you that is very positive later.

If your children are very young and you don’t think they can understand your plan – think of your explanation as a way of setting the structure for yourself so that you will remember to keep those communication lines open.  You’ll need those lines later.

Children get the unspoken energy of things more than the spoken – so if you are honestly trying to connect and create a structure for them – they will get that and feel that you are creating trust and relationship.

If your children are adolescents this is harder. First you need to set the stage.  Explain you are going to be doing things differently.  Talk about the importance of communication and connection and being mindful.  Show them that you are available and be congruent – do what you say you are going to do and what you expect them to do.

You will find they are not immediately responsive to these action but don’t stop.  Adolescents are always watching for incongruence.  If you can hang in there with them, continuing to honestly try to connect – they will note that internally, even if they do not appear to change externally.  That is your way in.

You will have to be consistent, trustworthy, and real or they will not trust you.

Apply the stop, look, and listen strategy, and the attention, intention, perspective, perception strategy,  that I have talked about in previous blogs, to keep yourself in the moment and mindful.  Don’t bring in the past unless it’s directly relevant to the now – or you will lose them and they will feel like you are lecturing rather than connecting.

Practice, be patient, be real and have faith.

In order to be there when they need you, you have to create the relationship when it seems it isn’t needed.

See you tomorrow.

Beth

Hello

One of my favorite children’s books is called Alexander and the terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day by Judith Virost.

It is a great book about how sometimes everything goes wrong and you just have to make your way through it, one foot in front of the other, with some degree of humor.

The hexagram Ming I / Darkening of the Light in the I Ching provides the best advice for a situation that is more serious than things just not going right. 

K’un above – the receptive earth and Li below – the clinging fire, together indicate that the sun has sunk below the earth and is therefore darkened – its name literally means the wounding of the bright and indicates the opposite of progress; this hexagram indicates a dark nature in authority and it has a negative connotation.  The proper action under these circumstances is:

“One must not unresistingly let himself be swept along by unfavorable circumstances, nor permit his steadfastness to be shaken,  He can avoid this by maintaining his inner light, while remaining outwardly yielding and tractable.  With this attitude he can overcome even the greatest adversities.  In some situations indeed a man must hide his light, in order to make his will prevail in spite of his difficulties in his immediate environment.  Perseverance must dwell in inmost consciousness and should not be discernible without.  …One should let things pass, without being duped.”   pg 140, Wilhelm, I Ching, 36 “…he veils his light, yet still shines.”

Recently, I have had an experience where no matter how I applied mindfulness, staying in the present, paradigm shifting, to the situation, I could not push through to a success or get the group to where I thought it needed to go.  Ultimately, it came down to just getting out, completing the task at hand, and reviewing  where the disconnects in expectation and what was requested occurred, and what had gone wrong. 

I was pleased to observe that I was not taking inappropriate responsibility for the badness.  I did not lose my center or my connection to the light. I could see how a number of different people, and main stakeholders had helped to create the difficulty in front of me.

I could see the conflict in the group and where the problem was, but could not get the stakeholders to work toward the required change.  Furthermore, I assessed as the day went on that I was not going to be able to change the wave of the energy toward the good.

The key to remaining strong through a difficult situation is to know what belongs where, and to whom, in terms of ownership and being able to flexibly respond to the situation.  It is also important to know when to exert a degree of personal effort to control the situation and when to allow it to flow to its negative outcome.

Sometimes, certain negative outcomes are needed to force the change required.

Being a change agent is generally considered an active role however sometimes the role requires being a target for others to work through their problems.  This latter role occurs more in therapy or consulting, but can present itself in other situations.

In certain structures, organizations, and family systems a kind of cataclysmic experience is the only way to move toward change.  It’s as if the internal conflict has to get so great or obvious that anyone passing by might be able to point out the issues.

This is because people tenaciously hold on to what is familiar; as a result they do not allow themselves to be open to inevitable and important change.

So if you practice mindfulness, paradigm shifting, staying in the present moment and you still can’t get to a place of understanding you may be in the middle of such a situation.

The best thing to do is to use questioning to increase your and the other person(s) perspective and expectations.

Identifying, describing, and focusing the group on what you see happening is a good beginning place to start.  And if you cannot assist the light being shown on the situation then it is best to hold to inner clarity and let the situation flow to its natural conclusion, without losing a connection to your own center.

It’s important to remain mindful, and in your center. Do not let the darkness overtake you.

Maintaining your light and awaiting a change in circumstances so that you can shine that light to effect the required change is the best action.

From a parenting perspective this is akin to picking your battles to achieve success.

Patience and good humor are important elements in all of these circumstances.

See you tomorrow.

Beth

Hello

In order to get something different you have to do something different.  In order to create peace we need to act in  a peaceful way toward each other.

We teach by what we say and by what we do.  If there is not a congruence between these two things then we teach the incongruence.

Acting in a discriminatory fashion toward some groups while saying to not discriminate toward other groups teaches that discrimination is okay under specific circumstances.

From a sociological perspective, it  creates a sense of an in-group/out-group in relationships.

This is the basis of discrimination.  First, the discriminated group needs to be identified, labeled, and separated out.  Next, the in-group leaders need to belittle, and make-fun of the identified out-group.  Next, the in-group needs to have some level of power with which other societal members want to connect or identify; and finally, the in-group followers have to identify they are not part of the out-group by either belittling, or negatively labeling the out-group or silently allowing the negative behavior.

All these actions together teach hate.  To teach peace we have to catch ourselves when we are participating in this structure and stop.

There is a beautiful song by Rabbi Joe Black about how hate is taught.

If a child acts in a mean or hateful way toward another group it is something that came from his family or environmental system; I am not addressing psychotic or psychopathic behavior here.

The song is encouraging us to be mindful about what we teach our children because they internalize it into a value and belief.  These are difficult to change as we age.

Many times individuals act in a discriminatory or biased way without consciously knowing or meaning to do this.  This is because the way we embrace these biases is through our personal family environments.  It is subtle how it gets embedded in our basic belief system and how we pass it on.  It spreads like a virus.

Sometimes it’s a matter of letting our frustration speak for us instead of letting our own compassion organize our speech patterns.  In our family we try to not use what we call mean words – stupid, idiot, jerk – instead we try to be descriptive – that person was mean, not thinking, not being fair, cut me off…etc.

I find that being descriptive helps to keep me out of a labeling mode.  It’s like using an anti-oxidant to combat a virus.

This increases my opportunity for understanding the other person as well as myself.  But I also have to be aware of what biases I swallowed whole from my family system and have to change in myself.

The best way to get there is through responding in the present moment.  Try to focus on description rather than labeling.  And think about how it would feel if someone treated you that way.  In other words, changing your perspective by applying the same label to yourself – if it feels demeaning it probably is a stereotypical label that may even be based in a bias.

Some things are obvious:  we know not to use certain words; they are obviously negative to us.  But, new words or accepted biases are not readily seen by the individual who uses them.

A friend of mine is 1/4 Cherokee and once she heard another friend say – stop running around like a bunch a wild Indians.  She was appalled that our friend was unaware of how she was discriminating and negatively labeling Native Americans.  Another time I heard a different friend say to a colleague when they were discussing the cost of something, can’t I jew you down on that?   The colleague was Jewish and felt it was a derogatory statement.

Both of these friends, who used these colloquialisms were highly educated individuals.  They were focused on social justice and interested in equality for  all people – yet both were promoting discrimination through socially condoned colloquialisms  – which were in actuality a stereotypical put down.

Recently, I have seen in a number of posts on Facebook, a social networking site, a reference to tea baggers.  Again, by highly educated, and by their own account, very enlightened people who are focused on social justice and in some cases, the energetic up-leveling of our society.

This is an example of a way to diminish and put down that group.  It is not enlightened or peacemaking.

It’s important to act in a way that is congruent with your speech, and value systems.  In order to teach strength, we need to be strong, and stand up for what is right, not with discrimination and power trips, but with authentically peaceful and compassionate action.

This is especially true when you are in a parenting or role-modeling position.  Those who are listening and watching you are picking up on these subtle incongruences.

The more we can be mindful, and really interact with each other in a compassionate way the more we can truly Teach peace which will Teach strength.

See you tomorrow.

Beth

Hello

Here is a quote from the Dalai Lama that I just read today – it speaks to what I have been writing about in the blogs about mindfulness and focusing on what is healing and positive rather than that which pulls you away from your true self.

With the realization of ones own potential and self-confidence in one’s ability, one can build a better world. According to my own experience, self-confidence is very important. That sort of confidence is not a blind one; it is an awareness of ones own potential. On that basis, human beings can transform themselves by increasing the good qualities and reducing the negative qualities.

the Dalai Lama

So if self-confidence is of the utmost importance than it seems we need to do a better job of identifying what we’re doing right, not just identifying what we are doing wrong, or what we need to decrease in ourselves or change.

It is through the balanced eye that we can best assess ourselves to increase or maintain self-confidence.

Just as Bravery doesn’t mean not being afraid, self-confidence is not hubris or narcissism.

Bravery is acknowledging danger or fear or concern and pushing through that to have the courage to act in a way that is ethical, or right or needed.  My daughter says I was brave I faced my fear and didn’t let my fear stop me.

Self-confidence is knowing one’s strengths and limitations and knowing how to utilize them positively.  It has to do with believing in yourself because of your knowledge about yourself.  This knowledge includes what you don’t like about yourself or feel is limiting about who you are, too.  That information is used to help you be the best self you can be so it doesn’t have a debilitating effect on your self-confidence.

Having limitations offers opportunities for innovation and change; thinking outside the box comes from this concept.  The idea isn’t to be perfect but to be your best self and then interact with others in their best selves.  This allows for real connection and productive enterprises that allow for transforming resolutions to difficult problems.

We can practice developing clearer pictures of ourselves through our interactions with others as well as our mistakes and successes in our activities.

When learning a new skill if we can evaluate what aspects of the skill we already have a sense of competence around that increases our sense of self-confidence.

For example for children beginning a new school, parents can remind them about what it was like when they started the school that they are leaving.  Point out that the child had the skills to get connected make friends and learn the specific subjects – and that the new experience has components of the same things so they have competence at them.

The parent can help the child evaluate what worked in those situations and how the new situation might be similar or different and what changes it may require.  This is the same for adults beginning new jobs or starting in new communities to make friends and connections.

Often what interferes with our self-confidence is how we interpret situations and expectations.  It also has to do with whether we can deconstruct the components of what is required or what is to be faced.  If we can properly deconstruct these then we have a better ability to negotiate the process and see where we have previous experience or competence.

Finally having a picture about how something should be or an attachment to things being a certain way will decrease self-confidence and ultimately success because it takes one out of a mindful state.

It’s important to be able to respond to the situation at hand in a flexible, open-minded way taking in new information and integrating it into what is already known trusting in yourself.

You can practice these skills in everyday life.  Notice how your self-knowledge and self-confidence grow.

See you tomorrow.

Beth

Hello

One of my favorite Professors in my Chinese medical school, Dr. Lyndsey Tunnell, was an innovative thinker.  He taught me that Chinese medicine addresses everyday habits and how to maintain balance through these.

You can focus on your eating, sleeping, drinking, exercise, and stress reduction habits and make adjustments to these various systems to allow for a return to balance in the spirit, mind, body system resulting in health.

From a Chinese medicine point of view you would be treating yin and yang and shen, Qi and Xue and bring these as well as the organ systems into balance allowing for each to flow easily and without stagnation during their proper times, allowing for balance within the system.

Using information from Chinese medicine, Buddhist philosophy, and Judeo-Christian spirituality I have identified a strategy for health.

Eight Habits to Change your Life and return to balance

First,  Meditation, Prayer, Focused Breathing, daily or twice daily, to redirect and refocus your energy.

– Connecting spirit, mind and body; Calming Shen and building Qi

Second, eat the rainbow, look for the colors of the rainbow on your plate every day to increase your access to anti-oxidant strength; and eat foods that are primarily prepared by you or someone you love.

– Body, Mind, and Spirit; building Qi and Xue

Third, drink 3-4 liters of water each day.  Most people are chronically dehydrated and use beverages that further dehydrate them throughout the day.  Water is the best cleanser and most health promoting agent.  It flushes out toxins from the cellular to larger physical level.  Some common indications of dehydration include migraine headaches, dizziness; Dry mouth, skin and joints resulting in painful joints.

– Body, mind, and spirit; balancing yin and yang

Fourth, Exercise 5 – 7 hours a week.  In March 2010 a new Harvard, 13 year study was released that showed that woman need an hour a day of exercise to maintain their healthy body-mass-index weight.  This is especially true for women over 50.  For anyone who has been following the old guidelines 20 minutes 3-4 times a week or even daily, and getting few results, this is no surprise.

– Body, mind, and spirit; balancing qi, xue, yin and yang

Fifth, sleep 7-8 hours each night and get to sleep by 11pm.  Children need 10 hours.  Sleep deprivation increases stress on your body and interferes with clear, quick, thinking; many people become irritable and have less capacity to deal with stress when sleep deprived.  Sleep deprivation is one of the major reasons for lack of productivity in the workforce.

– Body mind and spirit; allows for yin, Qi and xue to rebalance

Sixth, address anger and frustration early to extinguish them from your daily routine.  This is a major focus of many of the earlier blogs.  Mindfulness and paradigm shifting are difficult to do when in an angry defensive communication and angry , frustrated or fearful, internal sensing position.  Release of these stagnating  patterns via mindfulness and present moment interaction is paramount for health.

– Mind spirit, and body; smooths Qi, moves stagnant Qi and xue, balances yin and yang

Seventh, Focus on how to flow positively in your life to reduce stress and create success.  Focus on what you want rather than what you fear.  Remove obstacles in your thinking and relationships so that you are living congruently with your values and belief systems.

– Mind, spirit, and body; balances shen, Qi, Yin and yang

Eighth, apply mindful, present moment energy to your relationships and negotiations.  Figure/ground perception and response–ability in the world is most beneficial, and presents opportunity for connection and growth.  This is a great place to practice Compassion and understanding.

– Spirit and mind, and body; balances shen, Qi, and xue

So there’s a Sneak peak into my new book about Instinctive Health Medicine to integrate Spirit, Mind, and Body and return to balance.

Look and feel more alive and more youthful in just 8 weeks.

Add a new habit each week, in the order presented,  and you will find yourself happier, more vital and less stressed at the end of 8 weeks.

Start today and watch what happens.

See you tomorrow.

Beth

Hello

Compassion is a powerful word.  It is active.  It is a way of being in the world.

It can bring others together to create peace.  Peace in relationships.  Peace in families, betweeen children and parents.  Peace between countries.  Peace in the world.

In order for compassion’s healing power to work those engaged in relationship and dialogue have to be in  a mindful state.

A mindful state, not a righteous state.  A mindful state is a listening state not a teaching state.  It’s having your senses on receive and integrate, not send and conquer.

Compassion requires the ability to see figure and ground simultaneously and to shift paradigms with flexibility; it requires congruency between one’s words and one’s actions.

Peace isn’t going to present itself between parties that are each sending their righteous verbiage toward each other, or through proving your point.

Peace comes from fully understanding the other person’s point, and fully understanding your own, and then mindfully looking for connection points, where those two points connect. 

It requires an earnest communcation, asking questions, delving further, all the while with a suspended sense of belief, and a focus on understanding. 

To get to understanding one must make efforts to explain meaning and not assume that a word has the same meaning for both parties.  Inflection, and non-verbal statements too, must be fully evaluated and understood.

It requires the listening and understanding part happen first, then the focus on connecting. 

Denying the other person’s perspective and jumping to let’s just see where we agree is not peacemaking; it doesn’t result from understanding.  It’s a false form of looking for agreement, and an actual form of ignoring another person’s position, concerns.

Compassion is a two-way street, it’s a way of being in the world – an attention that you put to every thing in your life – yourself, your child, your partner, your teacher, your guide, your leader – all need compassion.

Apply a compassionate attention to interactions and relationships and see if you have a clearer, fuller understanding of them and yourself. 

It may allow for more of what you want to happen, not less.  The energy of all working together, unified as one, is powerful. 

Compassion, mindfulness, and seeking understanding increase connecting points so there can be unification, not as clones but as a transformed, thoughtful, mindful, response– able group.

See you tomorrow.

Beth

Hello

How you do One thing is how you do Everything.

In Buddhist philosophy, chop wood and carry water refers to finding enlightenment in everyday mundane tasks.

Additionally it has been interpreted as How you do one thing is how you do everything. Personally this has profound meaning due to my affinity for congruency.

If you live everyday life being mindful in the moment. Then there is much to be gained through quiet, solitary tasks.

My personal favorites are doing the dishes, sweeping, and working in the garden.  I find myself in a meditative state, with the water running and the steam coming off the soapy water, or methodically moving the dirt across my floor in neatly lined sweeps.  I learned this early in my life that being fully in the moment with these mundane tasks seemed to create a sense of peace and connection to my inner being.

I love standing in the middle of the river with the water rushing by me on either side, casting my fly rod into the water.  The rushing water, in the center of the river, looks like white birds flying off the water toward me, and has a sound-deafening quality; the sound so loud it is silent.  It is the most peaceful and meditative experience.

Last week my family took a walk in the falling snow; big, fresh, snowflakes attaching to our hats and clothes.  The air was heavy and there was a hush.  It was magnificent, just walking among the trees in the foothills, feeling the true beauty of our sweet life.

For Japanese zen meditation these actions are like the state of za-zen.  It’s a concept of complete mindfulness and attention in the moment that offers a sense of oneness with the act, or the environment, that allows for enlightenment.

You can find inner peace through the most mundane tasks. Your life doesn’t change once you become enlightened, only your perception of life changes. You will still need to chop wood and carry water but these chores will take on deeper purpose, and eventually you will find even the mundane tasks as spiritual in nature.

In Judaism one of the most sacred holidays is the Sabbath, Shabbat.  It is the most mundane and the most sacred.

Being mindful is not relegated to situations that are of significance but also those mundane, repetitive tasks that make up our everyday life.

Rather than rushing through the monotonous chores, mindfully focus on the action, meditatively being one with it.

If you can bring mindfulness to these everyday acts and chores then you will be able to bring mindfulness to the more penetrating concerns in your life and relationships.  Your state of being in the current moment is composed of whatever you do, big or small. Think about congruence; try to give the same degree of attention and mindfulness to all your activities.

You may find it increases your connection to enlightenment.

See you tomorrow.

Beth

Hello

In the early nineties I began to write about something I call The Path to Grace.

The components of this had to do with survivor scenarios and ways to return to balance or Grace.  I remember talking with a renowned author and lecturer in the counseling field about my ideas and him saying that the word grace was too religious and would not be greeted positively by the general public.

Recently I have noticed that the word Grace has found it’s way into our everyday dialogue.  Especially, as the concept of spirit, mind, and body being interconnected is more consistently identified when discussing health.

Ken Wilber, in 1991, called his book about his wife’s battle with cancer, Grace and Grit:  Spirituality and Healing in the Life and Death of Treya Killam Wilber; so I guess I was on the right track.

I have studied the I Ching for over twenty years.  This is a profound, philosophical book.  Both Confucianism and Taoism have their common roots in it.  I prefer the translation by Richard Wilhelm, with a foreword by Carl Jung.  The Book of Changes identifies hexagrams that indicate the ebb and flow of energy, and power.

The I Ching hexagram 22 called Pi / Grace states the following:

The most perfect grace consists not in external ornamentation but in allowing the original material to stand forth, beautified by being given form.  …The inner structure of the hexagram shows harmonious equalization of the movement, giving no excess of energies to the one side or the other. … This is the form of heaven.  Having form, clear and still:  this is the form of men.  If the form of heaven is contemplated, the changes of time can be discovered.  If the forms of men are contemplated, one can shape the world. …The  form of human life results from the clearly defined (Li) and firmly established (Ken) rules of conduct, within which love (light principle) and justice (dark principle) build up the combinations of content and form.  Here too Love is the content and justice the form.  …. Here we have a standstill (Ken) outside and a clarity (Li) inside….  p494-496 Wilhelm’s  I Ching

Grace is the form where Light, shows the authentic truth of an individual.

The state of Grace allows for the opportunity for one to let go of their habit reaction patterns, survival strategies or scenarios and let their true, authentic self show through.

It’s through compassion, mindfulness, and paradigm shifting that you can reveal your authenticity and thrive in the present moment.  This, to me, is the path to Grace.

Think about how you can  be still, with clarity, and respond in the moment to your situation mindfully.  The path to grace is mindful interaction with compassion and responsibility.

See you tomorrow.

Beth