Hello

“The healer knows that there is only one way to solve the truly difficult problems of this world:  with love, the energy of the heart and its permutations – – gentleness, kindness, patience, tolerance, and ethical behavior.” — Warren Grossman, PhD

I found this quote while researching information for an ethics seminar. It’s kind of cool.

Grossman was a therapist who developed this as a philosophy in response to his work as a therapist.   His website states the following:

For Grossman, ” Love – not romance, Tolerance – which does not mean to tolerate, Interdependence – with the rest of nature, Intelligence – not intellect, Healing – becoming more whole, Forgiving – exchanging anger for love, Respect – appreciative regard for that which is not familiar, Here and Now – The only time that is neither memory nor fantasy, Nature – what you are, Transformation – becoming better, Epistemology – knowing about knowing”;

his book Earth/Heart –’ what you are reflects the many important things the author learned through the years, specifically his encounter with the flow of life and his thoughts about the simple truths of nature’.  Warren Grossman, PhD

This is remarkably similar to what I have been writing about over the last few months.

There are many paths to this concept of Mindfulness.

Focusing on self-knowing and compassion toward others allows for the opening of one’s heart in a way that is different from falling in love.

One of my favorite authors Erich Fromm wrote about the Art of Loving.  Loving is not so much a feeling as an action; it’s a way of being in the world.

It seems to be more a matter of knowing the other, understanding the other, and accepting the other rather than making the other become something from your imagery.

When I think about the sixties and how free love was interpreted I think they missed out on the opportunity for truly freeing love and opening up to a higher level of consciousness toward others.

Then it was about getting out of the constraints of social mores here I am talking about upleveling consciousness.

Love is healing.

Truly gifted therapists love their patients.  They attend to them with this compassionate, accepting, understanding way and guide them toward health with openness, honesty, kindness, and resilient focus.

If you have been in therapy with a gifted therapist you found a healing path for yourself with their guidance.  Those who know this, know psychotherapy works.

The reason that it has not been proved that it works is due to the sad fact that not all therapists act in this manner.  It is not specifically prescribed to do so – in fact there are many boundaries, rules, and constraints set up to avoid such a relationship because most individuals don’t love in this higher consciousness way and falling in love with your patients will and does injure them.

It is my contention that one of the reasons for therapy is to resolve the injuries of the heart that occur without intention in childhood.  As such, often the work in therapy is to re-parent those beings you find in your practice.

As I meditate on mothering and parenting I see the similarities between therapy and parenting; how to best heal or help birth the consciousness of our children is to use these actions of higher love.

Compassion, understanding, accepting, being with while guiding forward these actions as parents make it so that injuries may be avoided or healed from the inside out.

Think about how you can free love or free your heart toward your partner and /or child – increasing your understanding of them so that you can be more accepting of them.

Of course I am not suggesting co-dependence or neglect of response-able expectation in relationship just seeing the person in front of you and loving who they are.

See you tomorrow.

Beth